17-30 November, 2002

Posted by Tim Ireland at 17 November 2002

Category: Uncategorized

This entry was posted on
Sunday, November 17th, 2002
at
8:18 am and is filed
under Uncategorized.

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Date
20021117

Time
08:18
Have you noticed that most spam gets sent at weekends? What does this tell you?

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Date
20021118
Christianity Watch
Time
08:52
The ever-progressive Church of England (aka Catholicism Lite) has given the go-ahead for ‘raves in the nave’. Gives a whole new meaning to ‘big fish, little fish…’ don’t you think?

Oh, and Jesus Christ is back, but there’s no need to look busy just yet. Currently he’s being distracted by some minor hosting problems.

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Date
20021118

Time
08:59
I’m amazed that there isn’t a copy of this fine album in my record collection. I must be slacking.

(Link via ultimateinsult.net)

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Date
20021118

Time
09:01
There’s a nice meteor storm due tomorrow. No doubt it will be overcast here and we’ll miss out (again), but if you want to watch a minor cosmic spectacle, possibly go blind and end up wandering the streets only to be picked off by vicious Triffids, then here are the peak viewing times in your neck of the woods.

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Date
20021118

Time
09:05
Cool. Bloggerheads is available in China.

Check here to see if your website has been filtered (i.e. censored) yet.

Oh, and if you are reading this from China, please allow me to take this opportunity to say that your government is tr*

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Date
20021118

Time
09:11
All 22,000 copies of the phone book for the University of Texas have been recalled because there are two ads for strip clubs on the back page.

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Date
20021118

Time
09:12
A guy on ebay asked for a buyer to loan him ‘$60 til next Friday’. The auction went through and he got his $60.

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Date
20021118

Time
09:15
The French are claiming that they invented cricket again.

The first documented reference to the game of cricket as we know it was made just outside of Guildford, Surrey (just down the road) but they shouldn’t let that stop them.

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Date
20021118

Time
09:18
Famous People who have Ridden in my Taxi.

Well, not my taxi. The taxi of the guy who runs this website. No, not this website, the website I linked to just now. Oh, you know what I mean…

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Date
20021118

Time
11:05
For the last three years, the Surrey Fire & Rescue Service has run a fire-safety awareness competition aimed at 10 and 11-year-olds. This year’s theme includes the following challenge:

Write a front page newspaper article about an incident involving Surrey Fire & Rescue Service.

Oops. No prizes for guessing which topic is sure to dominate the entries.

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Date
20021118

Time
16:45
Now I’ve seen everything. A pop-up (at Guardian online) advertising a campaign case study.

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Date
20021119

Time
09:46
Hi everyone. Sorry I’m late. I woke up in the early hours this morning to watch the meteor shower. The cloud bank that was in place at about 3:30am cleared away almost completely by 4:00am, and we were treated to one hell of a show. There were long ones, fat ones, short ones, skinny ones, but – sadly – none that squiggled and squirmed.

Just for the record, all of the plants seem to be behaving themselves and I woke up this morning with 20/20 vision – but my neck hurts.

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Date
20021119

Time
09:49
Dog bless the Web Archive. Here’s a very large collection of movies, archived for your education, pleasure and amusement.

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Date
20021119

Time
09:52
Woman imprisoned for not paying overdue book fine.

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Date
20021119

Time
09:59
This story is incredibly tragic, but I dare you to try to and get through it without stifling a giggle at least once:

Paul and Valerie Jungck had a baby.

Being devout Christians, they named him Zion.

At age 2, he died.

A filing cabinet fell on him.

They had him embalmed, but didn’t buy a tot-coffin straight away.

They were busy praying for his resurrection so didn’t want to order a casket, just in case.

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Date
20021119

Time
10:14
Fox Exec says:

“Stealing’s bad. Stop doing it.”

Now he wants our help to stop piracy. I’m sorry, but he’s already put me offside by assuming that I’m a pirate. Oh, and his boss is an arsehole.

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Date
20021119

Time
10:17
Hmm. I could swear that I’ve blogged www.survive2012.com before but, as a few of you may not be aware that we have less than a decade left on this planet (or at least, in human form on this planet), I really must risk reblogging for your sake. You’re welcome.

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Date
20021119
Tony Blair’s Email: Deletion of the Hostages
Time
10:21
From Stanford Web Credibility Research comes

10 guidelines for building the credibility of a web site.

Tony, please take note of Guideline 5:

Make it easy to contact you.

‘A simple way to boost your site’s credibility is by making your contact information clear: phone number, physical address, and email address.’

Shall we stop for a brief deletion?

Oooh, a juicy one a Wales TUC Cymru Research Officer. We hear from some of the same nutters, and he’s just announced to everyone, including (he thinks) Tony Blair, that he’s trying to get his e-mails screened, ‘to remove this person from sending me stuff.’

Wow. Big problem. I hope he doesn’t hurt his head trying to figure that one out.

*delete*

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Date
20021119

Time
10:34
Well, there it is: 10:34 and our youngest child has officially been on the loose on this great planet for a full 12 months.

Happy Birthday, griglet!

It should be stated for the record that this little one has a wonderful nature, is always ready with a smile, and can be reduced to fits of giggles at the drop of a hat. Of course, she is drunk out of her mind most of the time.

As you can probably tell from this photo, we keep her locked up in a darkened room – but this is for her own good, and helps keep her hangovers down to a dull roar.

(BTW, this excellent pic was by B3tan TooMuch2AM…)

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Date
20021119

Time
10:43
Now here’s an E-ticket ride waiting to happen:

Over 200 WWII bombs dug up at Hong Kong Disney site.

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Date
20021119

Time
10:45
Here’s a newsflash for you:

‘…in this country – England, that is – we cling grotesquely to the certain belief that we are a major power in world sport and we just won’t learn we are not.’

We are, it must be said, also quite good at teaching a country a new sport and then promptly being beaten at it by that same country.

Of course, I use the term ‘we’ loosely. I’m not sure if I qualify as being English. And I couldn’t care less about sport.

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Date
20021120

Time
08:36
It looks like Daypop (announced as being ‘down for a few days’ a few weeks ago) may have to be dropped from the nav bar. Hey, I held out for as long as I could, but I think it may be time to finally pull the plug.

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Date
20021120
Riding High on Blogdex
Time
08:44
Spam is killing email. The most enlightened comment so far has been: ‘Duh!’

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Date
20021120

Time
08:52
Michael Jackson dangles baby from hotel window (includes video footage). Is he going to use the ‘we were just playing’ defence again, or was Uri Geller in the background using a standard levitation spell?

1. The baby is white.

2. The baby is bagged and tagged like a terrorist suspect!

3. Did he really almost drop the baby? It certainly looks like it.

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Date
20021120
Christianity Watch
Time
08:57
Desecration Digest is a new online magazine ‘exposing the demons enslaving this world’ . My favourite article so far is See How Legalized Abortion Encourages Psychopaths. I wonder if he’s ever seen the film Basketcase?

(Link via ultimateinsult.net)

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Date
20021120

Time
09:04
Learn to become a Ninja in the comfort of your own home via this excellent home study program.

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Date
20021120

Time
09:07
57 gnome hostages discovered in 16-year-old’s garage.

Police managed to rescue them without killing a single one.

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Date
20021120

Time
09:15
Take the Hoax Photo Test. I got 19 out of 20. Nyer.

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Date
20021120

Time
10:05
In Australia, there are four primary kinds of place names:

Firstly, there’s the ‘Does What It Says On The Tin’ name. For example, Stoney Creek Road goes past a waterway with a few rocks in it. Similarly, the Pacific Highway idles past a somewhat larger body of water that most of us are familiar with. I shouldn’t really have to explain what the Blue Mountains are all about.

Secondly, there’s the ‘It Reminds Me Of Home – A Bit’ name. This includes many examples of false advertising, including the patently ridiculous New South Wales.

Thirdly, there are many, many places that are named after the white guy who ‘discovered’, built, or funded structures in (or expeditions to) the place in question. Until recently, Uluru was named Ayers Rock. Not after the white bloke whose major contribution was going for a walk and identifying a very large object that had been there for millions of years mind you, but the South Australian premier Sir Henry Ayers, who he was no doubt trying to suck up to at the time. This is a common variation on this theme that includes many names in tribute to folks who were dead famous, or just dead. The state of Victoria springs to mind, but on a less grandiose level, it should also be mentioned that there’s a swimming pool named after former Prime Minister Harold Holt. Who drowned.

Fourthdiddly, and finally, there’s the Aboriginal place name (or bastardisation thereof). This has given us place names such as Parramatta (which means ‘place where the eels lie’) and Woolloomooloo (which roughly translates as ‘temporary home of many a drunken sailor’, or so I’m led to believe).

It’s this last form of place name that’s causing a minor stink at home, after an Aboriginal group has proposed that local councils pay for the right to use/assign these names.

Thousands of place names (and millions of dollars) would be involved.

I have a feeling that local councillors will soon be scanning these towns and streets for identifying landmarks, aspects that remind them of some obscure town in Europe, or records of dead/famous/white people that may have lived or passed through there.

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Date
20021120
A Reader Writes…
Time
11:26
I just wanted to say that your site has had me in fits of laughter for hours. I’m going to stick it on my links page (or rather my researcher is because obviously I’m internet illiterate…being an MP and all).

Tom Watson – MP for West Bromwich East

Huzzah for Tom! I’ve had a peek at his site (yes, I’ve warned him about the evils of frames) and he looks to be one of the good ones. Perhaps he might even care to question his glorious leader on the small matter of accessibility. We shall see.

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Date
20021120
Photoshopping
Time
11:56
Sorry, it just had to be done.

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Date
20021120
Flash Thingies
Time
13:11
This is wonderful beyond description.

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Date
20021120
Tony Blair’s Email: Deletion of the Hostages
Time
17:34
An email on a subject close to my heart arrived today. In fact, I barely have the heart to delete it – but delete it I must.

It’s from an American, whose daughter is married to a British businessman. Her life is made a misery by her train commute (she has to travel 3 days a week, the poor dear) but her husband has replied calmly that the service sucks because of privatisation and nothing can be done.

His father-in-law quite rightly points out in this email that Amtrak is privately owned, but still manages to run to some sort of timetable (even if water unexpectedly falls from the sky) and asks just what the hell is going on over here.

I can understand his frustration. A ‘simple’ run to and from London via South West Trains damn near killed me from sheer exhaustion and yes, what these companies get away with beggars belief.

I think the secret lies somewhere in the husband’s reaction, which reeks of meek acceptance. Excuses are made, blame is shifted, and soon people are given something else to worry about. It’s very rare that someone will actually stand up and demand to see a head on a stick (unless they’re told to do so by a tabloid newspaper).

At least this man has taken action and shown us the moxy that has made the U.S. famous… erm, by sending his complaint to me.

*delete*

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Date
20021121
Flash Music Video
Time
09:19
It’s choppy, it’s amatuerish, but dammit it’s got charm:

We Didn’t Start The Fire

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Date
20021121

Time
09:21
The Ultimate Insult notes that many of its readers are from the UK. This site (from the UK) gets most of its readers from the United States. I knew there was some kind of weird synergy at work. Anyways, this was a nice link, and I’ll be hammering my connection accessing the bulk of it later today: a fine collection of opening credits from UK TV shows.

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Date
20021121

Time
09:26
Proof that politicians will say anything to get their way. Nevada’s recent pot legalization proposal took a nose-dive – primarily because this twit was running around claiming that the marijuana we have today is 30 times more powerful than it was in the 70’s. If only. Still, it was enough to wipe out much of the ‘I smoked it and it never did me any harm’ vote. A job well done, then.

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Date
20021121
LOTR
Time
09:33
Would the Lord Of The Rings series have been any good if it were made through the Hollywood system? Find out.

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Date
20021121

Time
09:35
What is your favourite color? Blue… No, I mean red! Arrrrrrggggghhhhhhh!!!

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Date
20021121

Time
09:37
A reporter finds out what became of the boy who bullied him at school.

I had lots of bullies at school. The worst one died from a heroin overdose. I’m still not sure how I feel about that.

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Date
20021121

Time
09:40
Yet another ironic lottery win, this time a man who is too old to enjoy it wins more than $30 million in the Pennsylvania Lottery.

When asked if he would play the lottery again, he replied, “No, never, I swear. I don’t want this problem again… It’s more money than I’ve ever had.”

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Date
20021121

Time
09:42
Who in their right minds would want to play a Wuthering Heights Role Playing Game?

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Date
20021121
Tony Blair’s Email: Deletion of the Hostages
Time
10:30
Today is a good day.

Sometime ago, I got in touch with the two major opposing parties about Tony Blair’s email address. It probably goes without saying that the Tories weren’t much help (but I can’t give you details right now, sorry).

However, and this is how my good day started, I found out (via their email newsletter) that our campaign got a mention at the activist site ParliamentUK.com

Then the mail arrived. It was a letter from the lovely Sue Doughty, a Lib Dem and my local MP.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, (and especially Squidboy, who asked all those weeks ago ‘Can Weblogs… get a question asked in the Houses of Parliament without using a bribe?’) we have – and you know what’s coming don’t you? – we have indeed had such a question asked, and no bribes were involved.

Monday 4th November 2002

Sue Doughty:
‘To ask the Prime Minister, what email address members of the public may use to contact him.’

Wednesday 6th November

The Prime Minister:
‘At present there is no e-mail address by which members of the public can contact me. However an address will be made available in the new year.’

1. You can always tell a newbie by the way they spell ‘email’.

2. Be warned that ‘in the new year’ in politicspeak does not mean January 1st. Or any date in January for that matter. It could even mean December 2003. We have to keep the pressure up.

Still, huzzah for Sue Doughty. I’m glad I voted for her.

Finally, this afternoon, after I’ve trawled through miles of download sites researching software for a new PDA, I’m changing into clean underwear for a dinner date at the House of Commons with the honourable Tom Watson, MP. As he notes, it should be a hoot.

Like I said, today is a good day. But I can’t help but feeling that I’m forgetting something… Oh, yes – a fresh deletion. (We cant afford to go soft now!)

There’s been lots of email about Iraq and, more recently, about the Firefighter’s strike. What makes today’s deletion so interesting is that it’s about both, based on the armed forces complaint yesterday that they can’t prepare to fight a war and put out fires – and Tony’s evasive response to same. I’ll quote the juiciest bit for you. Bloggerheads recognises the outraged member of the public from Reading:

‘My impression is that you seem to be fixated on your relationship with George Bush to the detriment of all of us in this country. Would it be too much to ask a nominally left of centre Prime Minister to put away his toy soldiers for a day and to sit down with Andy Gilchrist and the Local Authorities to broker a deal to end the Firefighters strike? I cannot believe that the Government are prepared to stand by and watch the next strike go ahead without intervention. You seem to be losing sight of what got you elected in the first place; commitment to essential services or playing the International Statesman with the most right wing and oil influenced US government in memory?’

That’s the longest quote I’ve published here at Bloggerheads, but it deserved to be read by someone, even if it wasn’t Tony.

*delete*

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Date
20021122

Time
11:30
Yes, it was a hoot. Yes he he is one of the good ones. Typically, though, I’m suddenly too busy to tell you all about it. In fact, today you may very well have to entertain yourselves.

Some suggestions? OK, how about choosing a site at random and looking it up at the web archive? Very educational. Much retro fun to be had.

Want to waste an hour or five? OK, head to www.b3ta.com/board and have a spazz through the older messages. Dig deep. Things move very fast at B3ta, and the typical web user only sees about 1% of it.

I’ve also stuck by ilovebacon.com for a long time. For a reason. Dig deep and enjoy.

Very soon, I’m going to drop Daypop from the navbar and add FunJunkie instead. It’s well worth my time, and therefore well worth yours. Visit. Again, dig deep. It’s equally enjoyable and has backed everything worthwhile that we’ve done here.

Alternatively, you may choose to dig through my archives. The 12-month anniversary of Bloggerheads approaches, and a lot has changed in the last year.

In fact, it’s probably fair to say that we’ve spent the last 12 months proving what we can do. The coming year is going to be about doing.

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Date
20021123

Time
11:44
I worked like a dog yesterday (and had a fair bit of travel there and back). I also have some nasty sinus congestion, so today I’ve crawled into a hole and only plan on coming out to dope myself up real good from time to time and maybe say ‘hi’ to you guys.

So, erm… Hi. Here’s another spammer following the publicity trail (thanks to Scott for the heads-up).

OK, that’s that done. Where are the drugs?

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Date
20021124

Time
09:28
Oh, I do so love trawling through my weekend spam:

‘Want to see what those HOT Soccer MOMS do when their husbands are at work?’

Heh. Hot Soccer Moms. Do they have any upskirt shots of them climbing into their 4WDs?

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Date
20021125
Flash Games
Time
08:49
Here you go; have a Happy Pill.

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Date
20021125
Photoshopping
Time
09:14
Each year, the BBC program What The Papers does a review of the year in pictures. This year, the Beeb has invited us to select our favourite newspaper picture as kind of a warm-up. There was a big hassle at B3ta on Friday when someone noticed that the image of the Argentinean football team holding handbags was credited as ‘Copyright The Daily Mirror’, when it’s public knowledge (at least on the internet) that they did not create – or pay for – the image. They picked it up off the internet and – showing typical tabloid arrogance – used it without the permission of the creator.

A few things should be noted for the record:

The folks behind B3ta were not the people pointing the finger. It was the community on the board making all of the noise, and B3ta did their best to calm them down. I could say something rude here, but I’ve promised to be nice.

One thing that worked in The Mirror’s favour was the ‘startling’ revelation that the chap widely credited with the pic actually seems to have nicked the finished product himself. (We made the same mistake here, but eventually discovered that the original was done by one Carl Baldwin. I’ve been in touch, I’ve seen the original PSD file, it looks authentic.)

So, concluded The Mirror, we didn’t steal it after all.

Oh, yes you did. In Carl’s own words, he was ‘gobsmacked’ when he first saw the paper. In other words, you used his image without notifying him. And then ran it on the front page without a care in the world. When I called the picture desk of The Mirror about this, they insisted that it wasn’t an original work, just ‘a Reuters image with some pictures put on it’ or some such nonsense.

They ran a small piece on Carl the next day and, as it turns out, he seems happy enough with the notoriety alone, but for The Mirror to enter it into this competition and state that they owned the copyright? Well, it got a lot of hackles up.

The caption for this picture at the BBC site now reads: ‘Used by The Daily Mirror’

A good short-term compromise (and words that ring true), but really it should read: ‘Created by Carl Baldwin.’

Just as it would for any other photographer or artist.

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Date
20021125

Time
09:15
Afterlifetelegrams.com: send telegrams to loved ones who have passed away with the help of terminally ill volunteers.

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Date
20021125

Time
09:19
42-year-old pastor arrested after accidentally closing a PowerPoint slidshow with child porn.

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Date
20021125
Notthattheresanythingwrongwiththat
Time
09:22
This is sure to annoy a few folks:

Boffins study homosexual sheep and claim that there’s something wrong with their brains.

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Date
20021125

Time
09:24
Apparently, blocking cookies and pop-ups is theft. Riiiiight. And what about the theft of my bandwidth?

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Date
20021125

Time
09:26
Watch women getting cream pies in the face and ‘other messy indignities.’

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Date
20021125
Elvis Lives
Time
09:28
Graceland has reversed its ban on Elvis impersonators. And justice for all….

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Date
20021125

Time
10:50
Dinner at The House of Commons went splendidly. Tom Watson is a gentleman of the highest order.

David Icke thinks that he’s a shape-shifting lizard, but I saw no evidence of that on the night. He did have his steak a little on the rare side, but that’s OK – so did I.

It wasn’t the only thing we had in common, either. Truth be told, we got on like a house on fire from the word ‘go’, so I was a little worried having read Mystic Meg’s message for Capricorns earlier that day:

Said Meg: ‘Someone you find easy to talk to and laugh with the moment you meet has lots of love potential.’

I must admit that we had to fight the urge to do it right there on the table (especially after I produced said horoscope and discovered that Tom was a Capricorn too) but doing so would no doubt have upset the other diners. Erm, and probably my bowl of crab bisque as well.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021125

Time
12:30
I was watching the dire program/poll fiasco Great Britons last night, when something awfully obvious occurred to me…

If that doesn’t tickle your funny bone, then perhaps this will.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021125

Time
16:25
Yes, it’s real.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021125
Flash Games
Time
08:47
Here you go; have a Happy Pill.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126

Time
08:40
Barbie is corrupting the minds of Russian children. Of course she is. She’s teaching them that you need to buy friends.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126
Riding High on Blogdex
Time
08:42
RIAA invades the U.S. Navy.

Oh, and just for the record, The Register really need to sort out their Page Titles. The complete lack of them not only has a negative effect on search engine results for individual articles, it also stops folks who scan Blogdex from knowing what their articles are all about.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126

Time
08:45
Is the United States the new Roman Empire?

Erm, and if so, when is it due to collapse?

You won’t find the answer in this article; it rattles on mostly about military power. Collapse comes from within, so if you’re an American and are worried about such things, you should keep an eye out for signs of political turmoil, unfettered greed, widespread gluttony and sexual depravity. Fark.com is a good place to start. That, or you can turn on your television set.

Oh, and here are some pictures of places that the U.S. has bombed.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126

Time
08:54
2x, 4x, 8x, 16x, 32x, 56x, 64x… CD-ROM readers seem to double in speed every few years. This site asks: ‘At what speed will a CD blow up, and can you do something to prevent it from exploding?’

Of course, to find this out, first you have to spin a CD-ROM so fast that it does explode – and therein lies the entertainment. At one stage, they actually ripped holes in the ceiling.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126
You Better Watch Out…
Time
09:02
Think twice before you sit on a stranger’s lap:

70 out of 1,000 Santa and Santa helper applicants are found to have criminal records.

‘Even the elves are fingerprinted and drug-tested.’ Heh.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126

Time
09:07
Lawyer Marc Smith decided to rent out his white stucco home as an adult film location ‘on a whim.’ It’s now turned out to be extremely popular as a repeat location as the house can be made to look like a modern dwelling (‘Here’s that pizza you ordered. Say, why are all you girls naked?’), a nightclub (‘Do you come here often?’) or even a corporate boardroom (‘No, I won’t fire the board of directors – dramatic pause – but I will sack your cook!’).

The problem is the house isn’t isolated enough, and the neighbours are up in arms.

One film company reportedly ordered a 10-year-old girl playing in the yard next door to go inside her house ‘before the cameras started rolling for one explicit scene.’ Oh well, at least she got to watch the rehearsal.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126
Photoshopping
Time
11:18
Some images are too large to post on the front page, but too big to go without a mention.

This is one of them.

I hope it cheers you up.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021126
Photoshopping
Time
17:13
Here comes another one, just like the other one (badda-dedum-dum-dum).

You would prefer another target? A military target? Then name the system!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:37
I’m sorry, but the brain project sounds like a really mental idea to me.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:38
The Stark County recorder’s office and the mystery of the lacy women’s underwear. Zoinks!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:42
I thought I told you kids to stay the hell out of my yard!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:44
European scientists plan on using their new BBT (bloody big telecope) to take a very close look at the moon to see if the NASA moonlanding craft is still there. You would think that this would settle matters for most conspiracy theorists, but some are already claiming that NASA sent mock (robot-powered) landing craft just in case such a telescope was ever invented. I bet they sent some fake golfballs up, too.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:50
Nicolas Cage and Lisa Marie Presley are getting divorced after just 4 months. Shortest. Publicity Stunt. Ever. In fact, it may just deserve the Celebrity Bestiality treatment. We shall see.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
07:54
This is a nice article on the subject of link whoring and permalinking. You’ll note that there are no permalinks on this site. The archive isn’t indexed by Google, either. If I think I have something of merit to say, I write an article and use a dedicated page for it – everything else is shelved in the archive. I have enough impact on search engines as it is. Can you imagine what it would be like if an entire year of Bloggerheads output hit Google’s database?

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
08:04
As the Ultimate Insult notes, this tool that lets you enter the URL of one weblog to find other weblogs like it is far from intuitive. You might be better off using a dartboard. And a blindfold.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127

Time
08:09
Hello to all of the lovely people who’ve wound up here from Crackermatic.

No, I don’t know when Crackermatic will return, but the elves have promised to get back to me about it soon.

In the meantime, drop over to FunJunkie; they have lots of flash wotsits featured today.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127
Photoshopping
Time
10:11
What can I say, but: ‘Heyyyyyyy!’?

I like this, it turned out well. I’m especially happy with how Joanie looks hot for those bulging Fonzarelli biceps.



Now, to work!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021127
Photoshopping
Time
17:12
Here’s a couple of extras for you:

1. More Happy Days meets Star Wars

2. Luke and Leia didn’t know they were brother and sister. But that’s OK – neither did their parents…

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:14
Big Blagger is running an ongoing feature on Celebrity Big Brother. If anybody out there cares. I haven’t watched much of it at all. Still, the site does have an animated GIF of Jade shoving her fist in her mouth and that’s got to be worth something.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:16
Hey kids! It’s Woody’s World of Penis Euphemisms!

I’ve just added mine. I call him Mr Rogers, because the little fella normally wakes up in an unusually good mood.

(Link via FunJunkie)

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:20
The Colossal Colon is on tour! Sadly, it doesn’t look to be scheduled for a UK visit. And I had my miner’s helmet ready and everything…

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:22
Some people spend a worrying amount of time obsessing over Peter Gabriel lyrics.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:25
This pretty much gets down to the guts of the whole ‘fair use parody’ thing. Shows like 2DTV can pretty much say and do what they like when it’s ‘art’, but when they use the same material for advertising purposes the shit usually hits the fan.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:27
Some Californian lawyer out to make a name for herself is pressing local authorities to investigate Michael Jackson over the whole baby-dangling thing.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:29
At first glance I thought it was surplus to requirements, but this

link popularity tool for weblogs is actually pretty good. For a start, it digs a little deeper than your standard link check and actually ranks links according to their ‘freshness’ (i.e. recency). Very useful, and added to the main links bar as of today.

Oh, if you want to do a standard link popularity test, Webmaster Toolchest (it’s on my old software page is still the fastest and easiest way to go about it.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:35
Well, it’s crass and rather pointless, but at least it shows that someone out there is listening:

Barbie has a weblog.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:36
Tomorrow is Buy Nothing Day. Yes, I will be participating, even though it’s pay day.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
09:38
This is pretty Hollywood:

Drowning men blown to safety by helicopter.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128
Photoshopping
Time
11:06
“It’s 1.12 parsecs to Yavin IV. We’ve got a droid full of stolen plans, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark and we’re wearing sunglasses.”

“Hit it!”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
12:13
There’s a very persistant rumour going around that Posh has dumped Becks because he’s been sleeping with Michael Owen’s girlfriend’s sister (or something like that). It didn’t start at Popbitch, but this didn’t stop lawyers representing Posh and Becks from jumping straight down their throat. Says Popbitch:

‘Their last letter told us that no-one using the site was even allowed to mention David Beckham’s name.’

(You see, this is what happens when an underground movement becomes a mainstream success…)

I’m sure you’ll hear the rumour about a dozen times today, but just in case you don’t, you can see this post to uk.misc or this thread in alt.gossip.celebrities

Is it true? Well, let’s just put it this way… a lot of people wish it were true.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128
Photoshopping
Time
16:10
And another one, this time with the A-Team. Do let me know if you’re getting sick of these.

Oh, I do have a small variation: Darth Maul goes out of business.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021128

Time
21:51
I’m willing to bet that there will be a fax not unlike this one waiting on the desk of the kind people who sort out my hosting tomorrow morning. Bloggerheads may well be taken down as a result, merely for reporting the fact (fact, I will remind you) that there is an unsubstantiated rumour doing the rounds about Posh and Becks.

As noted in the post below, this rumour spread to Usenet. As busy as the Poshbecks lawyers may be today, they certainly can’t hope to regulate Usenet (though Google may be pressured into removing it from their archive). The best they can hope for if the rumour is (as I suspect) false is for enough search results to turn up on this matter saying ‘Yeah, right! Sheyahh! And monkeys might fly out of my butt!’

Most people with two or more brain cells will then recognise it for what it is – a very seductive urban legend.

Doing business this way is sure to add fuel to the fire, which I believe is my right to note. We shall see what my host makes of it tomorrow morning.

[BTW, I tried to look these chaps up just now. For ‘IP Law Specialists’, they certainly are hard to find on the web. No listing at 192, either.Hey, I tried.]

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
08:38
Good news, daahlinks. Zsa Zsa Gabor isn’t really in a coma.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
08:42
Something for the geek in you; Star Trek ASCII art.

(Link via ultimateinsult.net)

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
08:43
What? More geekage?

It’s… the Monty Python and the Holy Grail Sweepstakes!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
08:45
Some very good advice on search engine optimisation from Google. Long overdue.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129
Christianity Watch
Time
08:47
Lordy, lordy, it’s a Christian musical about the Columbine High School Massacre. It’s a pity you have to pay good money to see the full transcript, but I am tempted. Too bad it’s Buy Nothing Day today. Perhaps tomorrow, then.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
09:04
And now, the news you’ve all been waiting for…

No word from my host yet, but The Guardian has reported the story (minus the rumour, of course).

As the statement from the Beckham camp notes:

‘… repeating the rumours could result in legal action.’

‘Could?’. Try ‘will.’

But how do I know if I’m repeating the rumour when, like most urban legends, it continues to morph as it’s passed from person to person?

Last I heard, Becks was leaving Posh because she’s really a man and the father of Prince William (purple monkey dishwasher).

And of course, this is only going to get worse as their lawyers shut down these websites. Those who previously would have disbelieved it (or perhaps couldn’t care less) will now be champing at the bit, trying to find out what’s going on.

Many other sites have also repeated the rumour, merely because they’re not allowed to.

In other words, Posh and Becks tried to nip something in the bud when it was already a great big f**king tree. Now, we’re looking at something more like a forest.

More soon.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
09:25
Well, I’ve talked to my host and they haven’t received any nasty faxes. Let’s hope it stays that way. In the meantime, please feel free to soothe your jangled nerves with this, my first sponsored Photoshop.

If the thought of losing Bloggerheads causes you concern, then perhaps you would also care enough to send a copy of this wonderful Christmas message to the special person in your life.

Erm, or you could cut out the middleman and head straight to itsmywishlist.com

If you wanted to. No pressure.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
10:14
Heh. I’ve been tagged, and tagged well. If you look closely, you might even see that my nose is bleeding.



You can all calm down, folks. I’d tell you more, but I don’t want to spoil anyone’s fun. All you need to know for now is that there is no need for panic. Erm, and my planned article about weblog marketing and issues of trust just got a few paragraphs longer.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
11:50
Yet another Posh/Becks headline. It’s just now coming up on midday, so I can make the following announcement:

The fax at FunJunkie is a fake. A hoax.

Despite being unable to find any firm by the name given on the fax, I didn’t suspect enough to mention it.

Despite seeing that the fax described legal action that was in no way legal (and had some glaring inconsistencies), I didn’t suspect enough to mention it.

A lot of this has to do with the factor of trust. Another major contributing factor is the fact that there are people in the world stupid enough to try this kind of thing.

Well, Rich owes me about 3 or 4 hours sleep, but I bear him no ill will. It was a point well made.

And now, back to our regular programming…

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
12:54
Well, the season is upon us. The most promising mechanisms to be first out of the gate are this gaseous version of the 12 Days of Christmas (link via TTR2) and this quite addictive Santa game (link via those rotten beggars at FunJunkie).

Oh, and I’ve just realised that I’ve linked to itsmywishlist.com on International Buy Nothing Day. Oops.

Still, it’s not as if I want to buy anything (except for me, that is). Just make a list and check it twice. Sorry, they don’t let you ask for sexy lingerie. I’ve already checked.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129

Time
13:28
Major lottery winner buys another ticket and wins again. No, it wasn’t Michael Carroll.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129
Photoshopping
Time
13:38
Another glorious Star Wars image for you:

The New Testament marked the end of the Old Republic…

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021129
Flash Games
Time
18:53
Blimey! That didn’t take long:

Michael Jackson Baby Drop

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Date
20021130
Tony Blair’s Email: Deletion of the Hostages
Time
09:21
Bloody hell. My another.com account has maxed out again. You know what? I’m tempted to delete all of Tony Blair’s email in one go. It’s taking up nearly 9MB of valuable space and, damn it, I feel like making a statement.

So, if I did this, would anyone out there be interested in personally pressing the ‘delete’ button?

You know, like when they get some lucky local kid to press the plunger at a major demolition.

Let me know.








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