Archive for the ‘Consume!’ Category

Posted by Tim Ireland at July 7, 2010

Category: Consume!

I was slumming it in the YouTubes recently when I happened across a 1986 ad for Wrigley’s chewing gum that seemed very familiar and yet entirely different. The following collection of clips should explain my confuzzlement:

Wrigley’s gum – the clean fresh taste of…

Yes, as you can see, Wrigley recycled the same “Taste of America” ad to produce some regional flavours for Australia and New Zealand. Some shots have been re-used, others replaced, but what’s also worth a look is the effort that went into re-shooting/replicating some shots to localise the image while keeping the ad’s ‘formula’ intact (e.g. the high-fiving pilots, the girl who misses her taxi, and the juggler with zinc cream on his nose); even the two ‘man releasing native bird’ shots match. The producers did let the side down by not forcing that little girl to fly two different flags, but still, it’s pretty impressive overall.

I’m sure most of you are aware that this happens (UK and Australian TV both feature many US-made commercials with badly-dubbed local voices) and you probably won’t even be upset with the duplicity of the concept, but I am genuinely pissed off that I was robbed of my opportunity to enjoy Great Hair Guy; the fella who’s deliriously happy at how good he looks.

Apart from the poor lady who misses her taxi, pretty much everyone else waving their arms about is celebrating an achievement, which makes Great Hair Guy even more hilarious to me;

“Hard deck my ass. We nailed that son of a bitch!” (high five)
“We got the Glickman contract!” (air punch)
“We totally won at baseball/basketball/etc.” (manly hugs)
“How’s my hair looking? My hair’s looking GREAT!” (fist pump)

Wrigley ad (1986) - Great Hair Guy

Here’s to you, Great Hair Guy. You rock.

(Apologies if this mockery is 20-odd years later than expected.)








Posted by Tim Ireland at June 23, 2010

Category: Consume!

Telegraph – Nokia in plagiarism row after ‘short film award winner disqualified for cheating’Nokia, the mobile phone company, has been forced to disqualify the winner of a British film prize after an investigation found her entry was a direct copy of an earlier work. The technology giant had awarded its Critic’s Award prize in its MiniMo competition to Jemma Lyon for “Forrest Chump”… a lo-fi retelling of the 1994 blockbuster Hollywood film, starring Tom Hanks. It was shot in one take on a mobile phone. But after winning the award earlier this month, the Liverpool John Moores University student faced claims that she had plagiarised her entry from a film called “Forrest Gump in one minute, in one take”.

Hi gang. I’d like to begin, if I may, with a comment posted to the nokiaminimo.com blog on 19 June that Nokia published, but did not answer (source):

Nokia minimo comment #1

Further comments by Will Tribble (the creator of the original film) were also published, but left unanswered. Here’s one example (source):

Nokia minimo comment #2

When Nokia finally did answer in Twitter, they certainly didn’t give any indication that they intended to do anything about it (source #1, source #2):

Nokia minimo tweets

In fact, it wasn’t until after there was a sizeable public outcry that Nokia did anything at all, and for over 24 hours now they have been refusing to discuss the point already acknowledged by MOFILM; “this issue should have been dealt with as soon as it was flagged however it was not”

And I think I might know why.

Here is a further comment that Nokia have published on their blog, but not answered (source):

Nokia minimo comment #3

The circumstances ‘Tina’ describes do not strike me as odd or extraordinary for the following reasons:

– 1. With all due respect to the filmmakers involved, I do not think Nokia were getting the best out of the filmmaking talent that’s available in this country, and I invite you to browse the ‘leaderboard’ to judge this for yourself (if you have the patience).

– 2. Nokia themselves documented two instances in which they aided a filmmaker with props and extras.

– 3. Nokia also describe plans for multiple campus visits on their front page; “Watch out for MOFILM:Labs on your campus, our amazing mobile editing suites that could help turn you into the next Spike Jonze.”

Therefore, while it’s possible that this is an unjustified attempt to damage Nokia or favour an entrant in some way, it seems perfectly plausible to me that Nokia* would send a company/competition representative out on campus to help a production along, especially if the concept was stronger/superior to what they already had (and judging by the judge’s decision, it was). Also, Nokia have been evasive to the point of embarrassment about the matter of plagiarism, and I suspect they have something to hide besides incompetence.

So the question I would put to Nokia is this:

Is there any truth to what ‘Tina’ claims; that Jemma Lyon was encouraged if not directed by a representative of Nokia to copy an existing work and pass it off as her own?

If so, then serious questions have to be asked about the manipulation/exploitation of this young woman and the wider betrayal of trust.

Over to you, Nokia peeps. Any comment?

[*I recognise there may be confusion between Nokia reps/staff and people from MOFILM, but MOFILM have a lot more to lose in terms of artistic credibility, seemed genuinely surprised by the discovery of plagiarism, and were nowhere near as evasive as Nokia about it. Therefore, I am putting the question to Nokia in the first instance.]

[Psst! A message for Jemma Lyon: If there’s any truth to what ‘Tina’ says and you have the raw footage, it may establish the truth of the matter, especially if the coaching described took place during the shoot. You may also wish to contact witnesses, ask them about their intentions, and have them independently write down what they recall if they wish to come forward. Remember; the charge of plagiarism is likely to dog you throughout your career if you plan to continue with filmmaking or any creative endeavour. I encourage you to stand up for your rights if you feel you have been treated unfairly, and I guarantee that if it’s a case of Nokia putting you up to this and then letting you take the fall, then you will not have to fight alone.]

UPDATE 24 June – A statement from Nokia appeared last night:

Nokia MiniMo**

Having continued to investigate the original minimo Critics Choice Award, it appears that one of our student team assisted in the making of the video, including offering their Nokia handset to shoot the short film and suggesting that the film was okay to submit to the competition. We are obviously very disappointed to discover that this has happened. While we believe that the original winner did not intentionally break the terms and conditions of the competition, the submission remains disqualified.

I hate to be fussy, but I think “suggesting that the film was okay to submit to the competition” could be clearer. Did one of the ‘student team’ (an employee of Nokia) originally suggest the idea to copy the film? I look forward to further investigation and some clarification.

[**Looks to me like someone had difficulty thinking of a good headline.]

UPDATE (25 June) – I’ve spoken to the communications team at Nokia, and they have promised a further statement within a week. Their position is that they wish to be thorough and discuss this in detail with all parties involved before saying anything further, which seems reasonable. The ‘disconnect’ that caused myself and others concern (i.e. giving the impression that the issue was being ignored or played down from the 19th to the 22nd, leaving Jemma Lyons to be pilloried as the sole party responsible during this period) appears primarily to be the result of an agency being in charge of the campaign weblog, leaving Nokia once-removed from the action, delaying their awareness of specific comments, and greatly complicating if not ruling out any meaningful dialogue on the blog. Speaking from experience (while tutting at Nokia for not being directly involved as they are with their Twitter channel), this explanation for the disconnect seems reasonable to me, and I trust the issue of this communications shortfall and its consequences will be addressed in the upcoming statement.

Until then, I think the most constructive thing I can do is leave you with some reassurance:

The ‘Nokia rep’ involved was NOT a senior (or even full time) staff member, and while this individual may have actively participated in the plagiarism rather than discouraging it in any way, the original idea to use Will Tribble’s concept/script in full doesn’t appear to have been anything more than a mistake by a young student (amplified greatly by circumstance***); for me the primary concern was that people in a position of power appeared to be betraying their trust and ours, and after speaking to Nokia I’m a lot less concerned about that.

[*** There’s one word that applies to how this whole project was run, and that is ‘sloppy’. I trust that this too will be addressed in the upcoming statement.]

UPDATE (01 July) – Nokia have since issued a further statement in response to a comment/statement submitted to their site by Jemma Lyon (a version of which was submitted to this site, but held over while I attempted to confirm her identity). A mirror of these two statements appears below:

To Whom It May Concern,
I would like to make a statement regarding the alleged plagiarism accusations from the Nokia Minimo movie competition.
I was approached by a Nokia representative who asked me to remake any video in under two minutes for his Nokia assignment. I was unaware that this was a competition at the time and did not receive a brief. The representative also promised to give me a mobile phone in exchange for assisting him with his project. I never received the phone. The Nokia representative was present during the filming of my video and after being asked several times if the film was ok to submit he insisted it was and persisted to show the actors the original video to direct them where to stand and what to do. At no point did the representative inform any of the people involved that the film was breaching the terms and conditions and I was led to believe that the entry was valid. Further to this, Nokia became aware that my entry was based on another video three days prior to sending me on the trip to Cannes, but they still sent me on the trip and refused to act until the public outcry. My name has been tarnished by this event. I have been branded a cheater amongst many other things too awful to write and I have yet to be informed of how Nokia aim to rectify this. I aspire to pursue a career in the creative media industry and this libel is a great hindrance to my progress to achieving the career I want. My efforts to expose the truth have been greatly subdued by Nokia and the rule of law seems not to apply to large powerful corporations in certain instances. In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that basing my video on Mr Tribble’s creative work was done in ignorance. I was not aware that I was breaking any rules and the Nokia representative never informed me that I was doing so. I previously had no interest in submitting an entry but I was misled into thinking that I was merely helping the Nokia representative, he has since personally apologised to me for the way I have been treated. Nokia has allowed my name to be dragged through the mud by shrouding the situation with half truths and even some out right lies in order to save their own reputation.

Comment by Jemma [Jemma Lyon] — June 25, 2010 @ 10:18 pm (source)

As per our last public statement, we believe that there was no bad intent from the original winner when entering the MiniMo competition. However, in directly copying an existing piece of content and not declaring that the content was not their original work, they broke the terms of entering the competition. This resulted in the entry being disqualified by MoFilm.

We are in touch directly with the disqualified winner as a statement by them contains a number of allegations about Nokia that don’t represent the information that has been provided to us; this is due to the differing accounts given by the winner and the Nokia student team member.

We apologise for the misleading guidance that the winner received from the Nokia student team member when completing the disqualified MiniMo submission. However, it was ultimately the entrants decision to select the content and submit the video and in doing so, accepting the responsibilities of entry.

We feel that we acted in the best interest of the competition and its participants with the information that has been presented to us.

Communication with our student team member shows that he did offer the entrant a Nokia X6 and we will ensure that the phone is delivered as soon as possible.

Comment by Nokia Minimo — June 29, 2010 @ 5:58 pm (source)

Today, Will Tribble (creator of the original Gump-in-a-minute film) offers us a further update that brings us no closer to a conclusion (currently it is the word of Jemma Lyon against that of a still-unnamed casual employee of Nokia) but does share some detail that Nokia will probably want to respond to.

Will Tribble – Nokia MiniMo competition

So, overall Jemma is claiming that this Nokia guy is almost entirely responsible for making the film all she did was film and and stick it into the competition under his directions, and Nokia didn’t send her back from Cannes, they just told MoFilm they had.

1st July:

I’ve just had a phone chat with a guy from Nokia’s PR team (Mark who runs their Twitter), and this was his stance:

– This Nokia rep was a part-time employee from their street team, who specialise in doing Nokia-related things in universities, etc.

– He was present at the filming and lent his phone. He knew that the film was a lot like our one, but said she should enter it anyway. However he had nothing to do with the planning, directing or editing of it.

– Jemma was sent back on the earliest flight it was safe to send her on, on Thursday morning (she was meant to leave on either Friday or Saturday, he couldn’t remember off the top of his head).

So all in all, I’m not sure what happens next and I have no idea who to believe. I don’t know whether Jemma was left to be the fall girl by Nokia or whether there’s been a load of misunderstandings.

My position is very similar to Will’s at present, but I’ll reserve further comment for now.








Posted by Tim Ireland at June 7, 2010

Category: Consume!

There are two types of tray liners that dominate the market; one goes in fast food trays and the other lines kitty-litter boxes. That crunchy nugget alone should tell you all you need to know, but today we’re going to dig all the way to the bottom for a special treat.

Below is a scan of the latest tray liner for Burger King. Upon closer inspection, your mind may initially refuse to accept what you’re seeing, but it’s exactly what it looks like:

burger king: bite me!

Yes, the cow is angry because you are eating chicken. It is jealous. The cow wants you to eat it instead.

And unlike the pig that wants to be eaten, the cow’s not even bothering to be polite about it.

Again, I should warn you that your mind may betray you at this point as it stubbornly clings to reason… but the cow’s wish that you eat it – and its willingness to stalk you to the bottom of every food tray – is part of a weird, sexual relationship that you’re a willing partner to (according to Burger King).

To remove any doubt about their intentions, here’s the 30 second TVC they released as part of this same Tendercrisp campaign:

Now, don’t get me wrong here; I do eat cow now and again and I do enjoy it. I’ve even dabbled in a little animal husbandry to the extent of having my entire forearm inside a cow’s bottom at one stage, but at no stage did I utter the words “Oh, you love it!” or go on to imagine a cow gaining pleasure from any beef-related mastication at the dinner table.

Putting aside what any given cow may or may not be capable of feeling about any assertion that they gain sexual pleasure and form deep emotional attachments as a result of being minced, grilled and munched; eating the high amounts of sugar, fat and salt in a typical burger triggers a fleeting pleasure response in your brain, and Burger King are clearly trying to associate that with sexual pleasure in order to sell more chicken or beef burgers (a win/win situation from their POV).

I don’t plan on having a cow about it; quite the opposite, actually.

I don’t spend money on companies that knowingly exploit the witless or insult my intelligence, and any money I spend on fast food in the next 3 months will not be spent on Burger King.

(They can count themselves lucky that it stops there; we all know what Tyler Durden would do.)

[In other news, look out for one of life’s biggest lies in response to this; the cry of ‘humourless lefty’ aimed at anyone who dares object to a joke that sells or reinforces a damaging lie… like equating homosexuality with paedophilia, for example, or singing about aid to Gaza as if it’s more than ample and used to arm children with missiles.]








Posted by Tim Ireland at January 29, 2010

Category: Consume!

[NOTE – UK-based web hosts are particularly easy to bully thanks to certain peculiarities in local libel laws, and people acting for (or on behalf of) Redwire Design have been taking advantage of that, by bullying my priovider rather than admitting their role in… well, more bullying. If Nick Catt or Alex Malloy or anyone else at Redwire Design want to deny the involvement of their staff/facilities in online harassment (including publication/promotion of my home address), then they can initiate actual civil proceedings or shut up. My account is honest and truthful, backed by evidence none of them dare challenge, and it stands. Relocated article reinstated 4 May 2010.]

Well, the unpleasantness continues, and Alex Malloy is hiding behind his company firewall. If you could take a moment to read the detail and send a quick email to Nick Catt (if you see fit), then I’d greatly appreciate the time and effort. Cheers.

To:
Nick Catt
Managing Director, Redwire Design

Dear Nick,

Apologies for the open letter, but an all-too-familiar game is unfolding and your company Director Alex Malloy appears to have blacklisted my email address(es) in response to my query about the apparent (but still-unconfirmed) spam-blocking of these same addresses by one of your clients.

I use the word ‘client’ loosely given that the relevant account involves Jon Chappell, Alex Malloy’s mate and partner in Kooba Radio. I’m guessing the whole arrangement involving your hosting of their website, email and what have you is more congenial than it is formal, but there is no question of you hosting it and being ultimately responsible for how your servers are used and for the conduct of your Director in their management and for any relevant communication from your staff about that.

Moving in the local band/club circles as you do, you must be aware of a band by the name of The Fighting Cocks. If you don’t know who these people are, your Director Alex Malloy certainly does; he’s played host to them on his Kooba Radio ‘station’ many times, and they appear repeatedly on his website (that you host). Core members of The Fighting Cocks (alongside hangers-on like Jon Chappell) also go by the name of the ‘Cheerleaders’, and in a lonnng campaign of harassment from behind these names and a series of sock-puppets and pseudonyms they have repeatedly published my ex-directory home address in an effort to intimidate me into silence. This all has to do with a conman of their acquaintance by the name of Dominic Wightman (NOT a name I expect you to know; this is just for background).

I can show you evidence of the involvement of the relevant Kooba Radio YouTube account in the active promotion of an account used (only) to broadcast my home address if you have any doubts about this, or if Malloy is denying any of it in your communication(s) with him. When we last communicated, he denied knowing about any of it, but the evidence suggests otherwise (personally, I suspect he’s lying and obfuscating to protect himself and his mates, if you’ll allow me to be frank with you) and it’s still no excuse for his conduct in response to fair and pertinent questions.

Malloy knows who the main account holder for ‘KoobaTV’ is, but refuses to discuss the matter in any way. You may choose to back away into a legally-secure (if morally dubious) position that this aspect of our (ahem) disagreement is none of your business, but he is also refusing to be clear about the nature of an apparent spam-block on an email account that you host, and the stench of bad faith is coming from Redwire’s corner as a result.

Oh, and now I’m receiving further threats made on behalf of these friends of the Cheerleaders who claim not to know anything about those same Cheerleaders. Here’s the latest, received just this morning:

from Princess Calamity [princesscalamity@googlemail.com]
to Tim Ireland
date Fri, Jan 29, 2010 at 12:02 AM
subject Re: Publication of your email address

Matyi is about to put a Gypsy curse on you and your entire family, at dawn tomorrow- and it’ll be a bad one :(
… you can avoid this curse, by never contacting or writing about us or anyone to do with us again. I’m sure your wife wouldn’t be too happy about your obsessions leading to her and you and yours getting lumbered with something that will follow your bloodline down the generations, now would it?
So.. your choice Mr Stalker.
:D
x
Priya

[FYI:’ Matyi’ = ‘Charlie Flowers‘]

Now, if it were taken in isolation some people might expect all those concerned to laugh this one off, but I’m detecting an implied threat against my family there, and I’d be interested to know what you think, especially as these and other threats are now being made on behalf of one of your ‘clients’, a Director of your company and now, apparently, the company itself:

from The Fighting Cocks UK [fightingcocks@live.co.uk]
to Tim Ireland
date Thu, Jan 28, 2010 at 12:45 AM
subject and you are now, officially, in the shit.

I TOLD you not to contact these people. But your mental condition meant you had to, didn’t it? OK you are now officially in the crap, P-Group has found your web host, and they have been notified.
You have a choice:
1. Walk away and look away, and NEVER contact anyone involved with us again.
2. Keep it up, and reap the whirlwind.

3. This means and includes: anyone at Kooba or Redwire.

Matyi
TFC Cheerleaders

[I fail to see what possible case these people can hope to present to my web host, unless they’re following up on Malloy’s claims of ‘threats and defamation’ that he is curiously unable to identify when challenged.]

As you can see, by attempting to contact you I risk ‘reaping the whirlwind’, and I apologise in advance for my next act, which is designed to ensure that this attempt will not have been in vain:

Hi folks. Without being rude about it, please forward a copy of this message (and/or a link to this post) to Nick Catt at nick@redwiredesign.com

If you think I’m being too long-winded (as usual), then do feel free to aid comprehension with your own summary, but please try to remain professional about it, as Nick Catt is a Managing Director and therefore likely to be a Serious Person, unwilling to stand for any swears or abuse.

(I’ll scrub this message when he responds. For as long as it remains live, the request stands. Cheers all.)

These people can only continue to attack me for as long as they remain anonymous, and these people will continue to attack me for as long as the man who is directing the attacks enjoys plausible deniability.

Your man Malloy appears determined to be a strong link in a long chain of ratbags. I’m hoping that you will recognise the value of being at least a little bit more professional about it, even if you’re going to deny all knowledge yourself and pretend that you’ve merely been away from your desk for a 67-hour moment.

Cheers

Tim Ireland

OK, so now we see what kind of person Nick Catt is, I guess.

UPDATE – Richard Bartholomew – Charlie Flowers Threatens Tim Ireland’s Family with “Gypsy Curse”








Posted by Tim Ireland at January 27, 2010

Category: Consume!

[NOTE – UK-based web hosts are particularly easy to bully thanks to certain peculiarities in local libel laws, and people acting for (or on behalf of) Redwire Design have been taking advantage of that, by bullying my priovider rather than admitting their role in… well, more bullying. If Nick Catt or Alex Malloy or anyone else at Redwire Design want to deny the involvement of their staff/facilities in online harassment (including publication/promotion of my home address), then they can initiate actual civil proceedings or shut up. My account is honest and truthful, backed by evidence none of them dare challenge, and it stands. Relocated article reinstated 4 May 2010.]

[This post as been relocated to this back-up blog after a complaint was made to my provider on 16/03/2010. The original article was posted to Bloggerheads.com 27/01/2010. Details here.]

This post is about some (or perhaps hopefully just one) of the wonderful people at Redwire Design, but first we need some background for those who came in late (and to cover some recent parts that have only just come to light). Please bear with me:

Early in 2009, a conman by the name of Dominic Wightman (aka Dominic Whiteman, aka Richard Walker) saw in the Glen Jenvey story an opportunity to screw over some former associates while at the same time screwing me (for reasons that have yet to be fully established). This scheme of his resulted in a false claim of paedophilia spread by Jenvey, who (with nothing to gain by lying) later claimed that he was fed this lie and my ex-directory home address by Wightman, along with the assurance that I “needed sorting out”.

Things didn’t quite work out the way Wightman planned, and eventually circumstances led to the uncovering of a blatant smear campaign created and conducted by Wightman, resulting in multiple visits from the police that Wightman hilariously portrays as being appointments of his own design.

Fearing what I might report (there is a LOT that has so far gone unreported), Wightman decided to get his retaliation in early (!) with an extraordinarily rambling, malicious and misleading attack on my good name. It was at this time that some associates of Wightman began to publish my home address alongside false accusations that I was in league with extremists, and a stalker of women.

The bulk of these associates hide behind pseudonyms, go by the collective name of the ‘Cheerleaders’, and are also involved in a band by the name of The Fighting Cocks. There are also some mates and hangers-on whose real names are more accessible, and that group of people includes ‘Jonny Yeah’ (aka Jon Chappell). More on him in a moment.

This campaign of harassment has included the repeated broadcast of my home address to the types of people that Wightman himself has described as having “a history of late-night visits to enemies”. Further, while the ‘Cheerleaders’ style themselves as anti-fascist activists, they had no qualms about repeatedly broadcasting my home address to members of the BNP while alerting them to my involvement in campaigns they would be none-too-pleased with. If the intention wasn’t to do me harm, it was to make me fearful for my safety and cause me distress. It certainly did the latter, especially when the campaign escalated to direct threats of violence, causing me and my family great concern.

‘Jonny Yeah’ (aka Jon Chappell) was CCed on the emails threatening me with violence. Further threats involving the continued misuse of my data were then issued on his behalf (and on the behalf of other relevant parties) after I dared to list on my site the names and/or email addresses of all those who were associated with the earlier therat of violence. ‘Jonny Yeah’ also appears to have been closely associated with an anonymous SPA (single-purpose account) on YouTube that was used in this ongoing campaign of harassment.

I can prove that this account was used to repeatedly broadcast my home address to people the author regarded to be potentially hostile to me, and that this was visibly and quite obviously the only purpose of the account. Further, I can prove that an account in the name of ‘JonnyYeah1’ was associated with this anonymous account and that an account in the name of Kooba Radio (‘KoobaTV’) was used to link to and promote the anonymous account in a way that cannot have escaped the attention of the main ‘KoobaTV’ account holder, even if they were to later claim that they had been hacked or set up or some such nonsense.

Kooba Radio was founded by… ‘Jonny Yeah’ (aka Jon Chappell), along with a man by the name of Alex Malloy (The Boy Malloy) and a mysterious woman by the name of Angela Collins (She Who Must Not Be Named).

After changing his story a few times, Johnny Yeah eventually denied involvement and claimed that Angela Collins had left Kooba Radio. He also appears to have changed the Kooba Radio email settings so they now reject any email from me as spam, but I have yet to confirm this. More on that in a moment.

Public versions of the ongoing online attacks from ‘Cheerleaders’ then started afresh, this time quite specifically on behalf of ‘Johnny Yeah’ and his Kooba Radio colleagues:

screen capture of some recently-deleted tweets from the Cheerleaders

Faced with the following error message, legally, I needed to be certain that I had been deliberately spam-blocked, not least because of the delightfully self-reinforcing accusation of stalking that is so easily exploited in situations where people start refusing contact by email:

Technical details of permanent failure:
Google tried to deliver your message, but it was rejected by the recipient domain. We recommend contacting the other email provider for further information about the cause of this error. The error that the other server returned was: 571 571 5.7.1 Message contains spam or virus : 16522:4131863472|125F (state 18).

The website and email accounts for Kooba Radio are hosted by a company by the name of RedWire Design.

The man who handles the bulk of enquiries for that company is…. Alex Malloy (Jon Chappell’s partner in Kooba Radio).

So, wanting to give Alex a chance to tell his side of the story (Chapell’s denials implied his involvement), and needing to go through Alex to find out if his ‘client’ had actively spamblocked me, I got in touch.

Having just been informed of pretty much everything I just explained to you, Alex was queried about the apparent spam block, but didn’t act at all surprised about any of it and – speaking as an official representative of RedWire Design – had this to say…

redwire design: we are good people

… before promptly hanging up.

Alex is listed on the Redwire site as a Director of the company (citing Search Engine Optimisation as his lead skill, and you better believe there’ll be more on that in moment).

The only person senior to Alex appears to be Managing Director, Nick Catt.

I should stress that there is no visible evidence of Nick Catt’s involvement in this ongoing campaign of harassment at this stage, but his profile states that he “runs a live music and club night with Alex” (and another man), so he probably knows those ‘Cheerleaders’ who are in The Fighting Cocks at least, and doing the right thing is likely to complicate his life in those circles, so I am wary of any further approach through direct channels, especially with the ever-present risk that someone might hide behind a cry of “Stalker!” at any moment

Instead, I’m here in public (again) having to explain all this crap (again) and finding myself quite surprised that I have to drag some people kicking and screaming into the light just to get them to do the decent thing (again).

In about an hour, this post should be a high search result for queries relating to ‘redwire design’. I am hoping that this will lead to a sudden upsurge of professionalism on their end, but I’m not holding my breath.

In fact, I’m half expecting some kind of misguided counter-attack by Alex Malloy or maybe even the company he does all them professional communications for.

Fine by me. I’d stake my SEO kung-fu against his any day… especially with the law, the truth and a shedload of evidence on my side.

UPDATE – 48 minutes, this took. Nowhere near the record, but still worthy of mention:

screen grab

UPDATE (28 Jan) – Hey, guess what, everyone? They’re going to be ratbags about it.

Alex Malloy cannot deny involvement in the KoobaTV account, and it is certainly reasonable in my view to ask who the primary account holder might be in the circumstances. He sees things differently.

Meanwhile the ‘Cheerleaders’ are hopping about angrily playing the side of law enforcement all of a sudden, outraged that I’d dare to ask anyone about their real names (when they claim it is not an issue); the abiding theme is that if I dare to object to being attacked, then they will continue to attack me… but it has already been established that they plan to continue to attack me anyway. It’s just another piss-poor justification to add to the collection.








Posted by Tim Ireland at December 15, 2009

Category: Consume!

This scandal of dumped toxic waste brought down a government, but the Swiss-based multinational Trafigura struggles on in the hope of burying the truth along with the bodies. What a bunch of shameless bastards.

You can help beat Trafigura’s gag on the BBC by embedding this Youtube video (1, 2) on your website and linking to this PDF.

Here’s why.

If you have a blog, please take the time to do this today with a post of your own. They can’t gag us all.








Posted by Tim Ireland at November 26, 2009

Category: Consume!

I’ve been funnelling most of the ‘diverting links’ content through my Twitter channel lately, but it will take a smidgen over 140 characters for me to run you through this so you get the full benefit, so for the first time in a long time…

I started by reading this post from David Thorne (a man who does not have any pets and once tried to pay a bill with a drawing of a spider):

David Thorne – Please design a logo for me. With pie charts. For free.

No, no, no… don’t read this yet. Go up and read that first. Then come back here. I’ll wait.

(waits)

Done? Good. Onward…

David Thorne’s encounter with Simon Edhouse made me want to know more about the man, so I looked him up in Google. The first thing I noticed was that – within hours of his post – David had already placed third in Google for Simon’s name. Without trying:

poor-simon.gif

The top search result was not Simon’s personal site (edgepolitics.com) or his business site (virtusoft.net), but this listing at naymz.com, which informed me that Simon has the following qualification from the Entrepreneurship, Commercialisation and Innovation Centre of the University of Adelaide (and no, I’m not making any of this up)

Master of Science and Technology Commercialization

I have highlighted this qualification (the result of a two year* course) so you can stare at it for a very long time, like I did, before moving on to Simon’s Twitter page and comparing it to David’s:

oh-poor-simon.gif

Admittedly, Simon has published over 6 times as many tweets than David, but if you’re going to commercialise, bums on seats is the slightly more vital statistic, and the margin is pretty clearly in David’s favour. Like 36 to 1 in David’s favour.

Now, most of you who know me know that I have very little time for stat-porn and associated willy-waving, but given Simon’s interest in the web and networking thingamajigs I’d say it’s a fair stick to measure him by, so I find this difference in Twitter performance telling, and a reliable indicator of how polite and respectful I might be in Simon’s position if asking someone like David Thorne for a favour… especially when there is a considerable risk of David saying or doing something that might result in many, many people pointing and laughing at me if I muck him about.

On that note we move on to where David Thorne is wrong; it is not Twitter (with a coin slot) that Simon Edhouse has invented, it is BitTorrent (with a coin slot)… and I have discovered on my travels that Simon appears to have gone about building the project in much the same way as he went about commissioning the logo for it:

BotTorrent commercial project, needs help
Simon Edhouse [simon at virtusoft.net]
Sat Jan 15 03:56:27 CST 2005

Hi,

I am new to this list. So I hope this invitation is OK. I am looking
for people to collaborate on a project to design a commercial
BitTorrent application. Specifically I am looking to find someone with
advanced maths skills who can assist with modelling various scenarios.
All interested parties are welcome to email me to discuss. –
simon at virtusoft.net

Simon

Still, Simon Edhouse has played a vital role in some pretty high-flying high-tech successes in the past (and you can be the 266th person to hear all about them here on YouTube), so who knows? We may yet live to see David Thorne begging to be a part of his success as Simon rocks with laughter on the deck of his yaght yacht… especially now that David has foolishly awarded him all this free publicity and I’ve unwittingly fallen into his trap as well.

In fact, if Simon is half the man I think he is, then he’s already worked out eight ways to make mockery shit money.

All he needs now is someone to build the gubbins… maybe fashion a logo… knock together a few pie charts… and paint his fucking house.

UPDATE – I was in two minds about publishing what I had found, but this removes any doubts I may have had about how much this guy deserves to be mocked. Most of you who know me will also know that I have NO time for this kind of crap:

tut_simon-is-a-dick.gif

Don’t feel at all bad for laughing at this guy… he is clearly a dick.

*UPDATE: 1.5 year course, I’ve found. Pardon the inaccuracy. All other updates have unfolded in comments.

UPDATE (27 Nov) – Lots of words down there. Here is a picture summary, issued after much discussion, and a complete failure by Simon Edhouse to follow through on any of his sound and fury about the exchange being faked:








Posted by Tim Ireland at November 13, 2009

Category: Consume!

Amount of time YouTube take to remove a video containing a glimpse of nudity from their servers after a possible/arguable violation of their Community Guidelines:

Less than 6 hours.

Amount of time YouTube take to remove my ex-directory home address from their servers (after it is posted as part of an ongoing campagn of harassment) after a clear and unquestionable violation of their Community Guidelines:

47 days (and counting… it’s still there)

Seriously, WTF is with that?

YouTube Community Guidelines on nudity:

“There are exceptions for some educational, documentary and scientific content, but only if that is the sole purpose of the video and it is not gratuitously graphic.”

YouTube Community Guidelines on harassment:

“There is zero tolerance for predatory behaviour, stalking, threats, harassment, invading privacy or the revealing of other members’ personal information.”

Me on YouTube:

Get your priorities straight, you dimwits. Age restriction would have been a more appropriate measure on this video that would have no cause to exist without an educational/documentary purpose. I’m staggered that you would rush to remove nipples within hours, but wait for well over a month before acting on the repeated/reported use of your servers for harassment.








Posted by Tim Ireland at May 20, 2009

Category: Consume!

It’s no big secret that I’ve a friend or two involved in Greenpeace. I just wanted to say that for the sake of clarity before I also say… that this is an epic campaign video that inspires me greatly (and not just to do better on my own little videos).

Oh Dog, how I love this. I love this so much, I’m immediately pushing down this Dorries whopper, because I want to show this around to everybody I know right now.

[Note – owners of narrower blogs will want to embed this version (while wishing you have my elbow room: optional but inevitable).]

Greenpeace – Ministry of Rice

It’s bloody great, isn’t it? Perfectly pitched. I’m neck deep in other people’s bullshit right now, but totally inspired by this, so it earns the full drill:

Take action: Stand up for your rice! (includes petition that I totally support, and have just signed)

Follow Greenpeace and/or Greenpeace(UK) on Twitter. (Or first join Twitter, then sign up up to follow Greenpeace and/or Greenpeace(UK) on Twitter. (Twitter’s a doddle and an ideal primary or secondary web presence for those who may not have the [whatever] for blogging.)

Read more about Bayer.

And, most importantly… pass it on.

Cheers all.

[Hello, Greenpeace video/marketing/other people who will read this. This is my latest. Drop me a line if there’s any corporate sock-puppeteers to be hunted down, because I take great joy in the sport.]








Posted by Tim Ireland at May 8, 2009

Category: Consume!, Updates

Stuff me and my selfishness; I was too caught up in my own shit to fully appreciate what poons has been going through, so please excuse me while I take care of a Bit of Necessary:

“Hi my name is poons and I am an alcoholic.”

Well, my name is Tim Ireland… and I too am an alcoholic.

I haven’t touched a drop for almost a year now – essentially since discovering the magic and purity of the word/concept ‘zero’… but I was a relative lightweight in the field, I had the luxury of looking into somebody else’s abyss, and I didn’t have the balls to blog the process.

Poons, you’re a bloody champ. I applaud you.

COMING SOON: Some stores and pubs are great about stocking decent 0% beer, but others not so much. I say it’s time the non-drinking beer drinkers had more choice than Becks or that goats-piss they call ‘Kaliber’ and I’m prepared to campaign for the privilege. For the record, there are two excellent and affordable options generally available; Bavaria 0.0% and my personal favourite, Cobra Zero. Both of these are stocked by major chains Sainsbury’s and Tesco, who have (I have noticed) slowly surrendered an increasing amount of valuable real estate to their range of non alcoholic beers. Non-alcoholic wine, however, is another matter, but I need to research some products more before pushing for anything.

(*That’s an easy pun for the taking, but you might want to leave it for the next guy.)

UPDATE – I’ve been meaning to post this picture of my local off-licence for a while now, too:

threshers

Sorry about that, Threshers.








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