Matti Juhani Saari (and assorted idiots)

An alert popped into my inbox at around 3am this morning, letting me know that Julie Moult finally returned to work late last night (almost a month after this embarrasment), apparently by ‘researching’ the vapour-trail left behind by Finnish gunman Matti Juhani Saari and then adding fresh details to this Daily Mail article.

Actually, the edit timestamps and the author’s failure to know/note the difference between profile text and a “posting” suggest that Julie simply lifted some details from this growing Wikipedia entry and invented the rest.

Here, let me show you what I mean…

This is what the article claims:

One posting made five days before the shooting said: ‘Whole life is war and whole life is pain. And you will fight alone in your personal war.’ (source)

Oh, really?

1. It is not a “posting”; it is text that appears in his YouTube profile. Like his list of interests/hobbies (“Computers, guns, sex and beers”) it is not a post, article or announcement, but instead intended to be general background about the user.

So far we’ve only split a hair, but stay with me…

2. No mention is made of the fact that these are lyrics, and not the words of Saari himself. Yes, lyrics can be chosen and used a personal statement, but why not say that? And while we’re at it, why would the Daily Mail of all papers miss an opportunity to jump up and down and point the finger at people with long hair who make loud music? (See also: Saari’s chosen screen name, Wumpscut86, and this link from his small pile of 18 ‘favourites’.)

Again with the hair, but we’re almost there. Here’s the whopper…

3. Did Saari dramatically post this text to Teh Internets “five days before the shooting”, as this article suggests? No, he didn’t. The text has been in place for well over a month, as the following screen capture of the time-stamped Google cache clearly shows.

The man killed 10 people. FFS, why would anyone feel the need to invent drama?

Perhaps to capitalise on the tragedy and shift a few more units? I’ll leave you to decide.

screengrab of cache of wumpscut86 youtube profile

Speaking of capitalising on a tragedy, several YouTube users are cunningly adding ‘wumpscut86′ to their profiles and/or video details in order to capture a few extra viewers, so hooray for them.

One bright spark even went so far as to pose as Matti Saari, posting several of his videos under the profile name ‘Mydadhitsmymom’ and claiming “yea whats up its me the guy that shot the school – i did it for the lulz”. Hilarious.

Still, I invite you to take a look at the comments left under that version of the ‘Good BYE’ footage. Essentially, these people have just been trolled by someone who is as funny as cancer, yet I can’t help but wonder what they were thinking as they posted these comments under what most of them clearly thought to be the account of a man who had just killed 10 people and was, at the time*, lying in a hospital suffering from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

(*These comments were all made between 0930 and 1030 GMT.)

Were they hoping that Saari would be able to read their comments in the afterlife? If by some miracle he had lived and was then tried, convicted and imprisoned, did they expect him to login to YouTube and reply from his cell? It boggles the mind.

grab of comments submitted to wumpscut86 video hosted by mydadhitsmymom

(BTW, for those who are wondering, ‘kusipää’ is a Finnish word that’s used in much the same way that you or I would say ‘bastard’, ‘arsehole’, or ‘Hendren’. Literally, it translates as ‘pisshead’.)

Related:
Ingram 2.0 – Shooter’s YouTube account didn’t help








Posted in Humanity, Old Media, Teh Interwebs | Comments Off

Nobody could have predicted…

Independent – Bush launches $700bn rescue plan and confesses he didn’t realise how severe problems were

Justin sees another parallel here.

Applaud* the artist here.

(*Save something for Tinkerbell.)

(Oh, and for Dog’s sake, stop playing with your pocket change.)

[Image not stolen. Used with permission. I don’t normally need to point that out, but a certain someone fresh from a rough afternoon should be on his umpteenth unit and *this* close to kicking the cat by now and I feel like rubbing his nose in it, just to set him off. Because I loathe cats. And because that’s what leading bloggers do. Apparently.]








Posted in Consume!, George W. Bush, The War on Stupid | Comments Off

This. (and another thing….)

Never Trust a Hippy – A declaration – draft 1: I thought it would be asking you – my readers – to help me compose a certificate that could be sent out to every Thatcherite and right-wing libertarian that you have contact details for….

To be read in full over coffee… but not too near the screen, especially if you’re going to stray into comments.

Speaking of which, allow me to draw your attention not only to that post, but also to this response from that champion of truth and justice, Paul de Laire Staines:

Guido Fawkes said

A re-draft:

“Greed — for lack of a better word — is good.

Greed is right.

Greed works.

Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit.

Greed, in all of its forms — greed for life, for money, for love, knowledge — has marked the upward surge of mankind.”

1. As usual, there’s not an original thought in the man’s head.

2. But at least the ‘city boy’ shirt mystery has been cleared up; Staines wears part of this 80s-era uniform almost everywhere for the same reason that children wear Superman* outfits.

(*Batman outfits are OK for grown-ups. Kevlar is a useful and practical material, especially in these stabby times.)

3. Not that we should expect anything less than a deceptive narrative from a man who’s made crafting these his raison d’etre, but greed for money is not the same as lust for life. Unless of course we are talking about circumstances in which your enjoyment of life can lead to someone having less of it… or none of it.

[Psst! That Staines is one of Britain’s most shameless hypocrites is not news, but just for the record; OMG, the thieving tosspot doesn’t like people stealing ‘his’ stuff.]








Posted in Consume! | 2 Comments

Oprah Winfrey royally trolled: this is your brain on paedo-fear

Oprah has gone all quiet, mid-campaign. Her official messageboard community and the user-powered blogs at Oprah.com have been closed for ‘maintenance’ for days. Here’s why:

Oprah vs. over 9000 PENISES

“Let me read you something that was posted on our message board by someone who claims to be a member of a known paedophile network. It said this; He does not forgive, he does not forget, his group has over nine thousand penises, and they are all raping children.” – Oprah Winfrey (19 Sep 2008)

Now that every reference to “over 9000 penises” has been scrubbed from her web space, Oprah probably hopes to return to her campaign with little-to-no mention of her Paedogeddon moment.

I wish her luck.

Next stop: disappointment and outrage that 4chan/Anon aren’t thinking of the children.

(To be fair to Oprah and her researchers, “It’s over 9000!” is a slightly more obscure meme than ‘All Your Base’. But still…)








Posted in Teh Interwebs | Comments Off

Clarkson Island

Via poons:

Harry and Paul: Clarkson Island

Too many Jeremy Clarksons and yet not enough Jeremy Clarksons to go round? My solution to that problem is remarkably Clarkson-like. First, you get yourself a 100+ horsepower industrial shredder, a really big shovel, and some drinking straws…








Posted in Video | 2 Comments

Iain Dale slams dodgy poll. (No, seriously.)

Iain Dale hahahaha frowns on hahahahaha fellow ‘blogger’ hahahahaha selling out hahahahahaha with unscientific poll!

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha…. *breeeeeathe*… ahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Can’t. Type. Or speak at normal. Rate.

[unexpected intermission]

Read more here.

Oh, and make a futile attempt to have Iain recognise his hypocrisy here if you feel like it, but do be prepared to (at least) be accused of being me or maybe some form of flying monkey-servant.

[His APCO-sponsored poll of blogs is just for fun, you see. That’s the difference. And no-one is being deceived about what it’s for. Did I mention that it’s just for fun?]

That’s twice this week (1, 2) that the Independent have fed us crap served as ice cream.

Meanwhile, over the pond, Sarah Palin’s email antics have led to a live internet kid-hackery whodunnit drama, complete with a ticking clock and a (so far) tenuous connection to the Democrats:

Christian Science Monitor – Palin’s hacked email account – what’s next?
The Register – Memo to US Secret Service: Net proxy may pinpoint Palin email hackers
Wired – Palin E-Mail Hacker Says It Was Easy

A free round on me if it turns out that Sarah Palin’s password was ‘1234’.

UPDATE (22 Sep, 1pm) – Phil ‘Dizzy’ Hendren charges me with wilful distortion here.

To avoid a lonnnng and complicated post, let’s skip past all examples of Hendren’s wilful distortion bar the most common/glaring one; his claim that I am responsible for “phone call making campaigns” (following email bombardment). I’ve made some rare calls to bloggers/publishers who have offered phone details as a contact option, when it was the only option left to me at the time. The only person in our little community who is guilty of ‘taking it offline’ and actually harassing someone by phone is Phil ‘Dizzy’ Hendren, who also went to the trouble of publishing my ex-directory number on his website in a clear effort to intimidate me. Hendren has sought to reduce his embarrassment over this by splitting hairs down to a subatomic level in some quarters and having others think me guilty of the same (or a similar) offence in others. He does this for the same reason that Iain Dale calls me a liar every chance he gets, and if this game keeps up, sooner or later we can probably expect Paul Staines to express ‘concern’ about the amount of alcohol I drink. How Hendren got his hands on my ex-directory number remains a mystery (the latest story has him calling Someone Who Is Certainly Not Iain Dale out of the blue and – surprise! – immediately chancing upon someone who had my home phone number and didn’t mind sharing this sensitive data), but he appears to be blissfully unaware that any uncertainty about the source of this personal data is a dangerous thing to have floating around when you work on maintaining data for an ISP that controls a great deal of personal data and doesn’t want their customers thinking that it might be used and abused by any old loser.

(ahem)

Now, it is Hendren’s position that I’ve engaged in wilful distortion because – in his view – Iain Dale did not actually ‘slam’ this unscientific poll.

Just for starters, there’s little-to-no question about it being an unscientific poll here, especially when Hendren (an unapologetic user of multiple/false identities) claims in this same post that he was willing and able to diddle it with ease…

“… I took the poll. In fact I took the poll on numerous occasions from numerous locations. I kind of figured that all I had to do was say I was a Labour member to make sure my answers would be included.” (source)

(Alex Hilton assures us that “Non Labour supporters who responded to the survey were stripped from the results”, which is just as reassuring as the ‘Gomer’ character from Good Morning Vietnam saying; “Well, we ask people, ‘Are you the enemy? And whoever says yes, we shoot them.”)

… so, if this is a notable instance of wilful distortion as Hendren claims, the only options left to us are:

– Iain Dale is mildly disapproving of the unscientific poll

– Iain Dale feels ambivalent about the unscientific poll

– Iain Dale does not care about the unscientific poll

– Iain Dale approves of the unscientific poll

With all of the above options, Iain would be blogging this quite deliberately as a feature (rather than a ‘Daley Dozen’ aside) not as a matter of principle, but instead to heighten/further Alex Hilton’s difficulty.

I’m happy to accept as a likely possibility any option that includes Dale being unprincipled, but it should be clear to any idiot not desperate for ammunition that Iain Dale does regard Hilton’s poll to be significantly flawed, and does regard these flaws to be a major aspect of the difficulty Hilton finds himself in (including, I would point out, the key problems that arose from his compromising his integrity/principles in pursuit of monetary gain).

But those with any doubts should take a look at how Iain responds to this anonymous ‘justification’ for the flawed nature of the poll, that he clearly misses as a joking reference to his own:

At September 19, 2008 4:59 PM , Anonymous said…

I think you’re being harsh here, Iain. As far as I can see, the poll was just a bit of fun and never claimed to be accurate.

At September 19, 2008 5:06 PM , Iain Dale said…

It was commissioned by a national newspaper!!

Iain Dale’s objection to this defence is immediate and clear; he obviously regards the poll to be flawed in some way, and – here comes the kicker – he regards the “(it was) just a bit of fun and never claimed to be accurate” defence to be meaningless because the poll was “commissioned by a national newspaper”.

Now, regrettably, we must leave Phil ‘Chick Magnet’ Hendren to his distortions/delusions, and focus on what the above reveals:

If it is seriously Iain Dale’s position that his unscientific poll is “just a bit of fun (that) never claimed to be accurate”, then he either regards this defence to be meaningless or doesn’t think much of APCO Worldwide and his own damn magazine:

“In early September TOTAL POLITICS, in association with APCO WORLDWIDE will publish the 2008-9 Guide to Political Blogging in the UK…” (source)

Oops.

(Psst! Meanwhile, Iain ‘Blinkers’ Dale watched his mate confess to skewing a poll with front-page implications, and saw only evidence of my ‘mendacity’. What a guy. I’d totally trust him to understand what the words ‘politically neutral’ might mean.)








Posted in Old Media, Teh Interwebs, The Political Weblog Movement | 2 Comments

Remember: September* 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day

Official site here.

British HQ here.

Enjoy.

(*Why September? There be an Arrrrr! in the month.)








Posted in Teh Interwebs | 3 Comments

Omission of detail

Omission of detail #1:

Septicisle on a few matters, including some case detail that the Daily Mail would rather not mention. The front page in question can be seen here.

Omission of detail #2:

Ian_QT fails to note or notice certain details regarding objections to wilful distortion. Helpful details can now be found in comments under that post.

Omission of detail #3:

I’m personally not prepared to comment publicly on the death of Jenny Grant at this time but, yes, I am aware of it. Thank you.

UPDATE – Oh, go on then… have another:

Omission of detail #4:

Check comment No. 4 over here for a litmus test or two and a minor detail that Iain Dale really should have mentioned in the printed version of his rigged poll of weblogs.








Posted in Old Media, Page 3 - News in Briefs, Rupert 'The Evil One' Murdoch | Comments Off

Noor Hanif’s letter to Alex Salmond

As off-putting as this not-very-appealing appeal was, the claim that someone had again silenced bloggers with the mere threat of legal action did get my attention, so I’d like to share the following with you:

August 8th onwards:

Evening Times – Councillor Kalashnikov: This is Glasgow councillor Jahangir Hanif caught on camera firing a deadly Kalashnikov AK-47 assault rifle at a military-style camp in Pakistan. The 46-year-old SNP councillor, who was last month reported to be a slum landlord, took five of his six children – including his five-year-old daughter – to learn how to fire the weapon in mountains in the Kashmir border.

Another tabloid more familiar to those of us south of the border also ran with the story the next day, as did The Times and the BBC.

Jahangir Hanif’s reported actions appear to have been within the law, but the SNP are big on gun control, and the death of two-year-old Andrew Morton is a major factor in the gun debate.

Even as a bystander it’s easy for me to see why Hanif should have been history the moment it emerged that he’d put an assault rifle in the hands of children, even if [rolls eyes] he had done so before becoming a councillor… but it’s also obvious that the SNP is not a party with a lot of ground to give. So on we go to the land of few surprises; Hanif gets a slap on the wrist, resulting in outrage (both feigned and genuine, depending on where you get your news from)…

August 31st onwards:

Sunday Herald – SNP refuse to kick out ‘Kalashnikov councillor’
Times – Anger as the SNP fails to sack assault rifle councillor
Evening Times – SNP accused of disgracing Glasgow over Councillor Kalashnikov
Scottish Unionist – Councillor Kalashnikov gets off lightly

It is sometime soon after this that a letter by Noor Hanif, the 17-year-old daughter of Jahangir Hanif, was sent to Alex Salmond, First Minister of Scotland… and (somehow) also released to the press/public:

Telegraph – Daughter calls for Alex Salmond to sack Kalashnikov-firing SNP councillor: The Scottish Nationalists decided this week not to expel Jahangir Hanif for showing his children how to use the gun during the trip into the mountains near the Kashmir border in 2005. But his outraged daughter, Noor, has pleaded with Mr Salmond, the SNP leader and Scottish First Minister, to throw her father out of the party. In a letter to Mr Salmond, the 17-year-old wrote: ‘I cannot believe he has been let off. My siblings and I were put in an environment where people were pointing loaded AK47 guns at each other. I think he should be fired to make an example, so that other people think twice before playing with guns and putting children in harm’s way. I don’t think you have taken this matter seriously enough. How can a man who can’t look after his children be allowed to represent the public?”

Evening Times – MSPs in fresh call to kick out gun councillor: Meanwhile, the row took a fresh twist today after councillor Hanif’s 17-year-old daughter Noor reportedly wrote to Alex Salmond calling on him to be thrown out of the party. She is claimed to have said: “I don’t think that you have taken this matter seriously enough I cannot believe he has been let off. My siblings and I were put in an environment where people were pointing loaded AK-47 guns at each other. He should be expelled he should be fired to make an example, so other people think twice about playing with guns and putting children in harm’s way.”

Daily Record – Daughter of SNP gun councillor tells Alex Salmond: Please fire my dad: Noor wrote: “If we had known he was taking us to somewhere like that, we’d never have gone. But my dad is a dominating man and we lived by his rule of law.” Noor was only 14 when she was taken on the trip in 2005. She said: “I still have nightmares about that day. The people were scary with their faces covered like in the movies. The gunshots were deafening – it really hurts your ears – and you never forget that sound. People were pointing the guns in each other’s directions. Anything could have happened. I was very nervous.”

The Daily Record goes on to use further extracts from the letter, but stops short of printing other allegations that are, quite frankly, tangential to the central issue here *and* a matter primarily for the authorities until the moment Noor Hanif turns 18.

If at that stage she still wishes to publish these allegations herself and is unfairly silenced, she will enjoy my complete support. I’ll even help her to build the website.

Until then, all I’m inclined to offer is this:

Jahangir Hanif is a total hypocrite for moaning about what his kids have may or may not have been dragged into, the more recent counter-claims of racism (1, 2, 3, 4) stink of the worst kind of political desperation, and Alex Salmond won’t be able to claim that he has yet to see, read or receive Noor’s letter for much longer without looking like an absolute dick.

I am not saying that it is right that a blogger can be conveniently silenced without any actual legal action. At all.

But subsequent warnings issued to newspapers suggest heavily that Jahangir Hanif’s threats are by no means idle, empty or even drunken… and in Usmanov’s case, his lawyers completely bypassed any need to go to court by avoiding authors and instead bullying their UK-based ISPs. Bloggers who then went on to defy Schillings by hosting their response(s) on US-hosted Blogger.com weblogs received nothing more than nuisance-level complaints to that provider. Two of the blogs that have published the Noor letter and removed it are Blogger.com-based and it would appear that they were at least contacted and challenged directly about their content.

This is, arguably, still a case of a man with money being able to silence someone without the means to defend themselves (see: Curly) but the wider matter is clearly far more complicated than that, obviously party-political in nature, and a lonnnng way from being such a clear case of abuse of UK libel law that the author(s) should expect an immediate avalanche of support.

But – as you can see – I have gone to the trouble of actually explaining the background so other bloggers might better be able to decide for themselves, and that’s a step up from badgering them about not taking immediate action over a complicated game of political football nobody bothered to even notify them about in the first place.

Related:

Press and Journal – SNP councillor threatens action over internet blog: A north-east woman has been forced to remove the full text of a letter written by the daughter of a suspended SNP councillor – who was filmed firing an AK47 assault rifle – from her internet blog after being threatened with legal action… In a statement issued yesterday, Mr Hanif said: “Editors are to be advised that a Labour Party blog containing defamatory statements concerning me has been withdrawn and an undertaking granted that it will not be re-posted following the initiation of interdict proceedings. Notice is given that in the event that newspapers or broadcasters publish extracts from the blog that legal proceedings will follow.”








Posted in UK Libel Law | 2 Comments

Moult-Watch: the first set of relevant image results are in

For those who came in late:
Bloggerheads – Julie Moult is an idiot
Bloggerheads – The Daily Mail: let’s kick arse and take names
Bloggerheads – The Daily Mail responds at last!

The first full set of relevant image search results are in – and the surprise leader is Live Search!

I must admit to being just a bit impressed. The performance is surprisingly early (and relevant) for this particular search engine:

1st is an image of Julie herself (including her status as an idiot) that comes to us via Jim Barter, 2nd is a picture of the big, mean bully who started this (Live is not fooled by this image being hosted by another website) and the 3rd result is the contribution of the artist whose work the Daily mail ripped off!

Meanwhile, Yahoo offers nothing of relevance, and Google is still poking around b3ta.com, mainly because a quirk of design allows users of that site to change their sigs so they update for every entry ever made all the back to the dawn of Teh Internets (almost); the only relevant results to stray onto the front page at Google have been the original ’50ft Blears’ image by Beau Bo D’Or image (via this post at The Daily Quail) and a classic belm from TheSpoof.com

I realise that initially I promised “a prize… for the best relevant performance in Google Images” but I think this set deserves recognition as well, especially as it’s the first relevant one.

So the first prize from the shelf goes to Jim Barter.

Congratulations, Jim!

I’ll be posting a numbered list of all the goodies and doing a random draw later.

Cheers all.

[Psst! It appears that Julie Moult hasn’t filed a single story since this post went live. And you’re welcome.]








Posted in Old Media | 5 Comments