ASSA locks vs. Manix

Posted by Tim Ireland at January 5, 2009

Category: Consume!

This entry was posted on
Monday, January 5th, 2009
8:53 pm and is filed
under Consume!.

In an effort to temporarily escape the nonsense of thin-skinned liars, right-wing drunkards and assorted mouth-breathers, I recently took to reading magazines that pre-dated even Paul Staines’ 1986 adventures with the BNP… but I was a fool to think that this would shield me from the freaky underworld of absurd demands and retractions.

Take a look at this massive half-page item from the April 23, 1983 issue of Eagle that addresses a great injustice done in the single frame of an earlier issue where a fictional superhuman robot manages to pick a domestic door lock:

Manix vs. ASSA

Incidentally, ASSA ABLOY no longer sell locks. Instead – stand by to tip the Eye – they offer ‘door solutions’. They even claim to be “the global leader in door opening solutions”.


(I kid you not; see here and here.)

Note – Nothing on any of the ASSA fleet of websites indicates how resilient their current products are to the efforts of robots, zombies, robot zombies, or lock-picking pixies… so be warned and do keep a shotgun handy.


  1. Wolf Solent says

    The other great example of this was when 2000AD was obliged to run a one-off (and presumably non-canonical) half-page Judge Dredd strip about what a thoroughly nice chap the Green Giant was, after the legendary 'Cursed Earth' story about homicidal genetically-engineered corporate mascots.

  2. Manic says

    Ahahahahahaha! That saga in summary and in full:…Consider me officialy amazed that the Garth Ennis Muzak Killer stories didn't lead to similar action.

  3. Bartholomew says

    I remember the revived 1980s Eagle went in for those naff photo stories, until the novelty wore off (any "before they were famous" models, I wonder?). Particularly memorable were the gruesome special effects that showed bodies being dismembered and disintegrated (i.e. faded out) by "Doomlord".I also remember the subtle moral lesson of a story (I think in issue 1) in which a father and son go fishing at a place where it says "No fishing". Worse, one of them catches a small fish that they discard on the bank rather than putting back in the water. Naturally, they themselves soon end up being "fished" by a passing UFO, and the son is squashed by an alien for being too small, while the father is eaten.

  4. Manic says

    Ha! That'll learn 'em. Dog bless The Collector.My favourite tale so far is from the 1983 annual, about a reviving miracle fluid called Farancide. I'll prob. scan it at some stage, so I won't spoil the ending for you now.

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