Archive for the ‘It’s War! It’s Legal! It’s Lovely!’ Category

Over the weekend, the Sun on Sunday columnist and former Tory MP Louise Mensch began beating the drum for war in Iraq. The intensity and bloodlust was striking, and stood in stark contrast to the thoughtful quote in her Twitter bio:

War is always a defeat for humanity.... KILL THEM! KILL THEM ALL!!!!!

It is also worth noting how ignorant and downright childish some of her tweets were. At one stage, Mensch began tweeting in Arabic, hurling abuse at alleged/perceived supporters of ISIS* that ranged from ‘your leader is fat’ jibes (seriously) to the kind of ‘cave dwelling’ and ‘goat fucker’ slurs that have strong, offensive and damaging racial and cultural overtones whether you direct them at a specific group or not.

(*NOTE – Some of these so-called ISIS operatives used words like ‘fag’ and ‘dude’, indicating to most reasonable people that they were more likely to be a teenage troll operating not out of a cave in Iraq, but their Mom’s basement in Iowa.)

Critics of this behaviour were characterised by Mensch as ‘terrorist sympathisers’, or ‘apologists and lefties’ who risked aiding and abetting the enemy.

I recorded not only the outburst, but the reaction to it (i.e. by logging mentions of her name/username in Twitter). Mensch was getting a lot of support from the kinds of people who will tell you that Barack (HUSSEIN!) Obama is a secret Muslim, but the majority of Tweets on Saturday morning especially involved people who were genuinely concerned that Mensch was (a) the victim of a Twitter hack, or (b) experiencing some kind of breakdown or drug/alcohol-fuelled episode. Any judgement on the latter aside, it is worth noting how many observers regarded her output to be so extreme that they could not believe that this dedicated controversialist had posted it herself… at least, not while sane and sober.

Keeping in mind that while there are outrages that ISIS (or IS) are responsible for, much of what Mensch was posting during this outburst was (at the time) unverified, wholly inaccurate, and/or in many cases entirely fabricated.

Zelo Street has some further detail here. This post exists mainly to call Louise Mensch out on one single fabrication in the hopes that she will finally retract it, not only to correct a shocking libel against the two people pictured, but to bring comfort to the tens of thousands of people who are needlessly concerned about the fate of one of the young girl involved.

Here are the two main tweets of concern. The first (bottom) is a retweet, the second (top) is where Louise Mensch repeats the monstrous lie in her own words:

A man who is not a paedophile comforts a girl who is not a rape victim

While the man pictured is (or perhaps was) an advocate of the Islamic State (IS) and may or may not be involved in the current armed conflict, in this picture he is not an invading soldier, but the host of a ‘family fun day’. At this 2013 “Ramadan event for children”, there was an cream-eating race, a tug-of-war… and a competition to accurately recite religious text, in which the young girl pictured was involved.

Now, if you share any concern about religious indoctrination of young children, we are totally on the same page. I personally own a bible that was given to me at age 8 in reward for accurately reciting the 10 Commandments, and I treasure it in much the same way that a soldier keeps the bullet that didn’t kill him. You can be as OK or as upset about the religious component as you wish to be, but it does not change the fact that the girl in the following video is upset only because of a mere error and/or stage fright.

The girl is NOT in tears because the host of the show wants to molest her. Perhaps Louise Mensch was thinking of someone else at the time.

A man who WAS a paedophile

Let’s be especially clear about two things: the man pictured has not just announced his intention to marry a young girl, and the event has not taken place in the recently-overrun city of Mosul. To claim otherwise is to engage in a lie with a dark and insidious purpose that also has strong, offensive and damaging racial and cultural overtones.

1. I am not getting into the whole ‘was Mohammed a paedophile?’ thing; it is sufficient to know that accusations of paedophilia carry a certain resonance in this context, and anyone claiming expertise in Islam and/or the West’s role in conflict in the Middle East should know it.

2. The idea that ISIS are invading cities and raping children is a lie that is clearly designed to provoke the kind of shock and fear that removes any question about the need for an armed response.

That there is reported to be “striking evidence” that ISIS have killed women and children and perhaps even buried some alive should not distract you from the latter concern. If anything, it should cause you to approach such reports with caution, especially if the source is calling for a response of total annihilation and accusing any moderate voices of being in league with the enemy.

Many observers of the outburst noted Mensch’s refusal to back down on what was an obvious lie specifically designed to draw people to join a call for bloodshed.

I would like to leave the last word to one such observer…

… but if you prefer we can leave the last word to Louise, her god, and her guns:

Posted by Tim Ireland at October 26, 2009

Category: It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!, Old Media, Tories! Tories! Tories!

1. I can’t really say that I’m a fan of Jimmy Carr, but I do admire his ability to go certain places, and his willingness to go there (in between corporate gigs). And here he is going there and doing that:

“Say what you like about the servicemen amputees from Iraq and Afghanistan, but we are going to have a fucking good Paralympics team in 2012” – Jimmy Carr

2. The thrust of this joke should be obvious, as should the fact that it has not been made at the expense of the ‘servicemen’ it mentions. It is not a frivolous piffle or a cheap gag at a wounded person’s expense, and I suspect some people are being deliberately obtuse about that. Most of the population probably never think of the wounded that emerge from service in our desert adventures, because the same people who talk with calculated pride about the upcoming Olympics would rather you didn’t look past the figures for fatalities, which are bad enough. This joke drags you right into the middle of that with one deft stroke, and will probably leave you there (and/or echo in your mind), especially if delivered as one of the last jokes of the evening, as this one was.

3. It does this while managing to be genuinely funny at the same time [insert joke at Carr’s expense here], and it has done so for weeks on end without incident. The only outrage has resulted from tabloid newspapers presenting it out of context, and bracketing it with attacks from a range of right-wing rent-a-quoters.

4. Looking at the activity on Twitter, the number and nature of tweets show a small number of people reacting to the tabloid beat-ups, but no overwhelming public outrage driving it. This is, in short, the kind of deliberately manufactured and beat-up campaign that Jan Moir falsely claimed she was the victim of when she refused to apologise for her disgraceful attack on the late Stephen Gately (more).

5. You may recall that, after her hateful and homophobic attack, Jan Moir refused to apologise, while the Daily Mail stood by her, allowing her to keep her job and providing her with legal/PR support. You may also remember earlier this year when Derek Lambie and Paula Murray enjoyed a similar level of support from their tabloid masters after a disgraceful attack on the childhood survivors of the Dunblane massacre in the Scottish edition of the Sunday Express (more). No-one lost their job over either outrage.. but when Jimmy Carr makes a move that is nowhere near as misjudged (or malicious), suddenly the whole mob from both tabloid groups is on deck calling for his career to end. What a bunch of hypocrites.

6. Oh, and take a look at the bloke who’s leading the calls for an end to Carr’s career:

“This was a remarkably dim and foolish thing to joke about. It’s not funny and this man’s career should end right now. I understand his desire to shock but there are certain subjects you just can’t make fun of and one of those is the sacrifice of our troops – especially this close to Remembrance Sunday. It was a very tasteless mistake. Somehow his style of comedy has blinded him to what he is saying. It is too late for an apology.” – Patrick Mercer

Yes, this is the same Patrick Mercer who presents himself as a credible authority on extremism and terrorism, but doesn’t think that placing his trust in two discredited ‘terror experts’ (and then lying about that) should end his career (more | latest). Hell, he doesn’t even think it warrants an explanation.

7. Conclusion: this tabloid campaign against Jimmy Carr is a pathetic deceit of feigned outrage and gross hypocrisy.

8. There may be a joke in this; what some writers will run when they have’t got a leg to stand on and all that…. but being a humourless lefty, I couldn’t possibly comment.

Mr Jenvey is busy elsewhere early today, but he has promised to share a statement with us later.

I’m happy waiting for that, but here are a few extras for those of you who have looked through the old magazines and fiddled with the empty play-table and are now getting fidgety:

Teh Man somehow saw to it that I missed this epic thread.

Save the ‘ I Love Horses’ website!

Julian Petley cups John Beyer’s logical fallacies. (link via another great weekend link-fest from Septisicle)

Ignore the link if you like, and just love the headline; Arrest in Mandelson custard probe

Mail on Sunday – How MI5 colluded in my torture: Binyam Mohamed claims British agents fed Moroccan torturers their questions

Telegraph – Binyam Mohamed torture claims: Calls for judicial inquiry

And finally, as if some strange hand of fate were at work, I arrived at (pfft!) the Jack Straw weblog this morning to discover that is was updated yesterday with the following message:

With regret blog comment moderation has been turned on. Political argument is welcome (see posts below), but name-calling and general abuse is not and won’t be published.

So good luck bringing up any of that torture nonsense there and seeing anything substantial published; even thinking for a moment that the sainted Jack Straw would allow torture on his watch constitutes ‘abuse’. How very dare you.

UPDATE – You’re *still* bored? Tch. OK, I’ll have the nurse put some cartoons on:

Saturday Morning Watchmen (more) (via)

UPDATE – Tut. Me and my memory. Sir Paul Judge would like a quiet word with you about the party system.

Posted by Tim Ireland at March 4, 2009

Category: It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!

You know I don’t typically ask this of people, but your voice is needed today.

Here’s Craig Murray:

Craig Murray – Your Help Needed – Reveal Torture to Stop It

On Tuesday 10 March the Parliamentary Joint Committee on Human Rights will discuss whether or not to hear my evidence on the UK government’s policy of using intelligence from torture. They discussed whether to hear my evidence on 3 March but failed to reach a conclusion.

The government is lobbying hard for my exclusion. I need everybody to send an email to to urge that I should be allowed to give evidence. Just a one-liner would be fine. If you are able to add some comment on the import of my evidence, or indicate that you have heard me speak or read my work, that may help. Please copy your email to

Please also pass on this plea to anyone you can and urge them to act. Help from other bloggers in posting this appeal would be much appreciated.

More here in a must-read post.

My letter appears below. Please don’t feel that you need to echo my point, as it addresses matters in a practical way that some might consider insulting:

From : Tim Ireland
Subject: Craig Murray’s evidence

Dear Sirs,

I became aware of Craig Murray after he warned our government of torture and abuse in Uzbekistan, and had his career and reputation rubbished in response. I then later watched a senior cabinet member (Blunkett) praised by then-PM Blair as a man without a stain on his character – after he had actually done what Foreign Office elements of the same administration had only falsely accused Murray of (see: visas/favours and adult situations).

I have also watched Jack Straw turn down the most perfect opportunity to challenge Murray on his claims at a public meeting (see: 2005 general election). It wasn’t until Murray had left the room that Straw felt comfortable enough to claim that ‘we don’t do torture’.

Only now we find out that, in some cases, we do. We also found out a while ago that Jack Straw and Tony Blair had arrived at a policy of not being drawn on detail when discussing torture with the public.

And part of what Craig Murray claims – “I was told at this meeting that it is not illegal for us to obtain intelligence gained by torture, provided that we did not do the torture ourselves” – fits perfectly with recent discoveries of our role in overseas rendition, does it not?

It’s those pesky details is what it is, but I think you’ll find them the key to this matter, rather than a distraction.

You’ll also find that many people will remain deeply suspicious of this government (regardless of your findings) if Craig Murray is not allowed to present his evidence, especially after so much effort has gone into suppressing it.

And one of the big factors of torture – i.e. one that impacts on us as a nation – isn’t how things are sometimes, but how they appear.

Close Murray out of this investigation and the government will look as guilty as all hell, if you’ll pardon my manners.


Tim Ireland

A lot of work has gone into burying Craig Murray and/or his testimony. Let’s help to undo it. Just for kicks, because we’re wild and reckless and bored.

Outstanding: The Crisis of Credit Visualized (via)

Viz now has a website that’s even slightly less shit than before, which makes me very happy.

Some kind (and really quite true) words from Ian Appleby leading into the antics of the Indy and their bad habit of pretending to accept comments when they’d really rather you shut up and went away. It could be a simple case of poor housekeeping, but I’ve watched entire comment threads disappear from the Independent website; they’re as bad as many of the tabloids on most fronts. More newspapers have been willing to try the comments-lite solution since the public face of blogging was taken over by a bunch of comment cheats. Funny how that works, isn’t it?

The new and renewed Daily Mail Watch is about to loom on your horizon. You have been warned.

Via Carl comes news from (and of) another jolly useful site from the good people at
FOI Request re: Mark Thompson’s trip to Israel for talks with Ariel Sharon

The Sun didn’t really discover Atlantis via Google Earth. I can tell by that look on your face that you’re totally shocked by that.

And now, some things you can see from Google Earth that The Sun would rather you didn’t.

(So is The Sun spending most their budget on watching Jade Goody die and filling in any blank spots with stuff they found on Google Earth? It certainly seems like it. And if you don’t mind me saying so, it’s this kind of clever newspapering that makes Rebekah Wade long overdue for a promotion.)

Iain Dale’s somewhat misinformed view on Star Wars reminded me of Starcrash, the world’s greatest space adventure movie ever, ever, ever. It’s even got a hairy-chested Hoff. Watch the whole thing here, if you like.

Speaking of hollow imitations dressed with shiny lights; here’s what the pollsters are saying about Sarah Palin’s future.

On the subject of Google-bombing YouTube, here’s a result you might enjoy (screengrab)

And finally, some good news from the land of we-don’t-do-torture:

AP Newsbreak: CIA destroyed 92 interrogation tapes
The Times – Britain admits rendition of terror suspects
Guardian – UN attacks Britain over torture claims
Septicisle – Rendition flashback
Justin McKeating – David Miliband and Jaqui Smith: something to hide, something to fear

Note – Any use of the audio featured in this post (or text from same) must include a link to – ideally, a link to this post and/or any relevant update – or (for non-web use only) a clear text credit for ‘’

16 Mar 2009 – Audio confirmed here as authentic. These are two *actual* recordings of Glen Jenvey speaking to an unknown interviewer, recorded sometime after 05/02/2008, most likely on or about Monday 25/02/2008
02 Mar 2009 – Two alleged recordings of Glen Jenvey speaking to an unknown interviewer, recorded sometime after 05/02/2008



I think it might be best to allow Glen Jenvey to introduce himself, as it’s that kind of post:

Glen Jenvey worked for several military attachés covering terrorist groups, including al-Qaida and their members in Britain. His sting led to the capture of Abu Hamza al-Masri, a major terrorist. Multiple other terrorists were also caught due to his efforts. He has been profiled and interviewed in major media across the globe, including in the US, UK, Russia, India, etc. He co-authored the book “War of the Web” with Jeremy Reynalds. (source)

In January of this year, I alleged that Glen Jenvey had been falsifying evidence of extremism after failing to troll Muslim communities for suitable tabloid fodder.

A moderator of the relevant forum ( declared that the same person who had registered a profile under the name ‘Abu Islam’ [abuislam] (used to falsify evidence of extremism) had also registered a profile under the name ‘Richard Tims’ [r.tims] (used to promote a website that was later discovered to be listed elsewhere as belonging to Mr Jenvey).

Since then, there have been many anonymous contributions seemingly in favour of Mr Jenvey’s position, but nothing verifiable… aside from the statements featured here in this article by the same Jeremy Reynalds:

In an e-mailed statement, Jenvey denied being Abu Islam, adding that some inflammatory posts formerly on the site have now been either removed or manipulated to the forum administrators’ advantage. He said, “Over the years I have monitored both and and their chat rooms. I know they hate me enough to try and discredit me.” (source)

Richard Bartholomew pointed out here and here that none of these statements addressed the identity of ‘Richard Tims’, so – via Jeremy Reynalds – I asked:

Glen Jenvey, do you deny posing as Richard Tims, using the name Richard Tims or knowing anyone by the name of Richard Tims?

This arrived on Saturday:

Hello Tim,

I have been in contact with Mr. Jenvey. He says that he is not Richard Tims, that law enforcement officers are looking into your site’s “hate comments” about him, and that he will be in touch with you soon.

Best regards,

Jeremy Reynalds

It is my understanding that, yes, Glen Jenvey has made a complaint to the police accusing me of hate crime… but I’m trying to be as understanding as possible about that, because it is now clear to me that Mr Jenvey himself is being actively targeted by al-Qaeda.

I know. But bear with me as we go through the evidence…



For now it’s important that you take a moment, as I did, to reflect on the following undeniable facts:

– Glen Jenvey denies being ‘abuislam’

– Glen Jenvey denies being ‘Richard Tims’

– Glen Jenvey feels aggrieved/confident enough to classify my assertions to the contrary to be a criminal act, motivated by hatred.

A gentleman does not make complaints to the police lightly, and I take Mr Jenvey to be a gentleman.

Therefore the onus is on me to revisit the evidence and make more of an effort to appreciate claims that much/all of it has been falsified as part of an extremist plot to discredit a successful independent anti-terrorism operative.

As I revisit this evidence, I will be presenting fresh evidence in the form of audio recordings, and seeking testimony from a British diplomat and a Conservative MP.

For the sake of clarity, I ask you to bear with me as I do all of this while maintaining the position that Glen Jenvey is being singled out for special attention by al-Qaeda operatives determined to destroy his reputation:

EXHIBIT #A – ‘Abu Islam’, ‘Richard Tims’, and The Sun

(This exhibit works best when read out in the voice of Fox Mulder.)

In July and August of 2008, al-Qaeda operatives submit to the following business directories under the name ‘Glen Jenvey’:, 10Directory, DirectoryHulk

They also take the calculated risk of promoting the URL on two websites that Jenvey reads on a regular basis; once on Lionheart, a website he is friendly with, and once on, a site he is monitoring for extremist content.

A month or two later, the same al-Qaeda operatives use the same computer to register a new profile at in the name of ‘abuislam’, and spend close to 3 months patiently ‘trolling’ the group with a series of provocative posts.

Finally, in January 2009, they hit paydirt; Jenvey sees a thread in which ‘abuislam’ is active and – playing right into the hands of al-Qaeda operatives – bases his entire story on the content posted by ‘abuislam’. This story is then passed on or sold to The Sun, who also decide to focus on the content posted by ‘abuislam’, and even feature a claim based on the ‘abuislam’ posts as their front page headline.

(Alan Sugar later sues The Sun over this front page claim, but there is no telling at this stage if this was down to pure luck or part of al-Qaeda’s brilliantly-conceived plan.)

A moderator at (quite possibly acting on instructions from al-Qaeda) uncovers the carefully-laid trail leading from ‘abuislam’ to ‘Richard Tims’, but does not investigate further and/or uncover the link to Glen Jenvey; this, brilliantly, is left partially – if not entirely – to chance.

This is where I come in and unwittingly aid al-Qaeda by independently uncovering the evidence connecting and Jenvey (that was, if you recall, planted by al-Qaeda operatives some 6 months earlier).

Granted, most of this seems somewhat unlikely at first, but you must remember:

(a) al-Qaeda is a fanatical, well-funded and far-reaching organisation

(b) for Jenvey himself to be behind the ‘Richard Tims’ post, he would also have to be the mastermind of a scheme where he established a website to compete with the story agency that feeds him by creating a website with a near-identical promotional domain name (SWNS attracts punters via, while the site registered under Jenvey’s name made a similar pitch at

(c) for Jenvey himself to be behind the ‘abuislam’ posts, he would have to knowingly and needlessly interfere with the security/publicity of several wealthy and powerful people; an act that makes no sense for a man in Jenvey’s position… with or without the risk of discovery.

Jenvey claims to be in the business of stopping extremism, not creating it or encouraging it. Stirring up any open forum with suggestions that readers take more militant action against specific individuals creates a needless risk that even most amateurs would understand to be beyond the pale, not least because you have no control over who will read and be influenced by your call to action.

But to better appreciate Mr Jenvey’s position, you must also consider the risk of discovery, which comes with the following immediate consequences:

– Alienating the news agency that supplies him with income

– Discrediting him in the eyes of a tabloid newspaper that supplies him with publicity/income

– Creating several wealthy/powerful enemies

But these consequences are only the beginning if al-Qaeda have their way…

EXHIBIT #B – The Wikipedia Edits

Much shorter and easier to appreciate this one; this archived version of a Wikipedia investigation is your doorway to a long list of edits made to Wikipedia seemingly in support of Glen Jenvey.

I say ‘seemingly’ because edits involving profiles for Abu Hamza, James Ujaama, Abu Izzadeen and others paint a picture where Glen Jenvey is repeatedly offering evidence to multiple recipients in security and law enforcement who universally reject it in favour of other evidence if/when matters ever lead to the inside of a court room.

Why would Glen Jenvey undermine his credibility by constantly describing repeated circumstances in which his reliability, the reliability his evidence, and/or the method(s) used to secure it are called into question?

Why would he raise the question (again and again and again) about what exactly might be stopping various authorities from using his evidence?

Also, what could he possibly hope to gain by attacking the PCC by making absurd claims that they are in league with terrorists?

The intention of al-Qaeda is clear and the pattern of their complex strategy now clearer; they seek to damage Jenvey by:

– Undermining his credibility

– Creating circumstances in which his past/methods may be subject to doubt or scrutiny

– Creating enemies within the PCC; an organisation that regulates the industry that supplies him with publicity/income

By now you should be aware of the ingenuity of al-Qaeda’s dastardly plot; Jenvey is fast running out of friends, and he appears to be the sole engineer of his own downfall.

It is about this stage that al-Qaeda strikes with a typically bold move that I hope will eventually lead to the undoing of these evil-doers.

EXHIBIT #C – Alleged recording of Glen Jenvey #1: The Diplomat and The Cousin

First, a word about these two clips:

* These clips are from a longer sample of audio presented to me as being part of an interview conducted with Mr Jenvey sometime in 2008.

* The only statement that I wish to make about the remaining audio at this time is that it exists and it is in my possession.

* These clips have been trimmed, but not edited in any way to rearrange or distort their original content/context.

[MINI-UPDATE – Yes, the audio is ‘real’ in that it was really sent into me and was really claimed to be a genuine audio recording of Jenvey and an unnamed interviewer. The audio is not something that I made up or invented for a laugh; it is instead a real thing that some people might choose to laugh at.]

* I have added the sub-titles (and a video background of the cave in which I imagine an al-Qaeda operative would operate) but the audio is 100% original, as delivered, fresh from the dead drop.

* I would like to stress that it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever for someone in Mr Jenvey’s position to be so candid in any interview, never mind a recorded one.

* Rather than subject these recordings to voice-print analysis (or even mere naked-ear comparison to other known audio of Jenvey) I instead choose to believe that this audio has been fabricated somehow by al-Qaeda operatives.

With that in mind, we arrive at the first audio file and the data therein:

Alleged recording of Glen Jenvey #1: The Diplomat and The Cousin from Tim Ireland on Vimeo.

Audio Transcript:

‘Jenvey’: I was… I basically… I basically uncovered all the films. With…. a university professor whose cousin, Sherard, is the British Ambassador to Afghanistan, but at that stage was the British Ambassador to Saudi Arabia. If I don’t think the cops are taking me seriously… or not acting on information given over to them or MI5… we bypass them and I will use one of my number of diplomatic contacts… or it will go to Sherard. And if that fails, I then go to the press.

The process described here deserves summary; when the police do not regard certain evidence to be useful/usable for some reason, they will be bypassed and high-placed contacts within our diplomatic corps will be put to work to see if justice can’t be meted out by some other means. If those avenues fail, it will be time for trial by media.

I’m sure you can imagine how such a claim – were it to be attributed to Mr Jenvey – would isolate him politically.

But unlike other claims made in Jenvey’s name, this claim does not involve a security outfit with a policy of never making public statements; instead, this claim is made about a public figure.

For the first time, it is possible to cast light upon the shadowy claims that surround Mr Jenvey:

To: Sir Sherard Cowper-Coles
From: Tim Ireland
Subject: ‘Glen Jenvey’ audio

Sir Sherard,

I have been presented with audio that purports to be part of an interview with terror expert Glen Jenvey. The authenticity of this audio has yet to be fully established and I feel it only fair to warn you that some people – Jenvey included – suspect an extremist plot to discredit him:

As you are named in the audio file, you’re in an excellent position to make a judgement about its reliability/accuracy, and I’d be most grateful if you could answer the following questions:

– Have you in the past and/or do you at the present time have an information/intelligence-sharing relationship with terror expert Glen Jenvey, either directly or via an intermediary?

– If so, would you regard the arrangements described in the first audio file to be a fair/reliable description of your relationship with Mr Jenvey?

– Just on the off-chance; are you aware of this cousin person, and – if so – may we have his/her name?

– What are your thoughts on the likelihood that this audio evidence has been fabricated (possibly by al-Qaeda operatives)?

I’m happy to publish any response you may have, so please reply soonest.


Tim Ireland

OK, that should clear things up pretty quickly on audio file #1. Watch for updates.

Moving on…

EXHIBIT #D – Alleged recording of Glen Jenvey #2: Richard Tims and Some Guy Called Mike

This second clip is longer, but it will reward those patient enough to listen to it in its entirety:

Alleged recording of Glen Jenvey #2: Richard Tims and Some Guy Called Mike from Tim Ireland on Vimeo.

Audio Transcript:

‘Jenvey’: I’ve been a bit cheeky. I can’t get onto actual, um… Hotmail at the moment, yeh? But… my old friend, Omar Bakri Mohammad…

Interviewer: Who’s not in this country at the moment, is he?

‘Jenvey’: No… (he) loves speaking to journalists.

Interviewer: All right.

‘Jenvey’: Right, so we find (inaudible)… [searches for file/folder]… Um… Can’t find it. Anyhow, Bakri’s… Ah! Here it is. [locates file/folder] Now, this is me… I phoned Bakri…

Interviewer: Yeah

‘Jenvey’: … on a mobile phone. Spoke to him… about Abu Izzadeen

Interviewer: Mm-hm

‘Jenvey’: Saying that I felt that… if the police had this so-called evidence for so long

Interviewer: Mmm-hm

‘Jenvey’: Um… on your computer…

Interviewer (reading): “Mr Richard Tims”

‘Jenvey’: That’s my… one of my false names.

Interviewer: That’s you, is it? OK.

‘Jenvey’: Unlike… I know MI5 do not use reporters… um… and… they don’t pose as press

Interviewer: Mmm

‘Jenvey’: However, I’m freelance so I pose as anyone… to get what I what.

Interviewer: OK

‘Jenvey’: This is Bakri making a statement.

Interviewer (reading): “To Mr…”

Interviewer: for the record…

Interviewer (reading): “To Mr Richard Tims”… <- a long emailed statement follows -> “… best regards, Sheikh Omar Bakri”

Interviewer: That’s what he said to you?

‘Jenvey’: Oh, yeah.

Interviewer: When was that?

Interviewer (reading): “5th February 2008”

‘Jenvey’: So basically, he’s saying they found <- interruption: he informs housemate of pasta status -> he’s saying that the police found it at his home in 2006.

Interviewer: Yeah.

‘Jenvey’: I gave the tape… originally to the police in 2005.

Interviewer: OK

‘Jenvey’: Mike went to the MI5 in two thousand and… I think he went in 2006… ‘cos I arranged a meeting

Interviewer: Mm

‘Jenvey’: Um… for Mike to go and visit MI5 and hand over tapes.

The first thing that strikes most people about this audio clip is the ‘Richard Tims’ admission, but even more worrying is the claim about a freelance spy posing as a journalist.

The involvement of real or fake journalists in the intelligence game is frowned upon in media circles for reasons that should be obvious.

Again, you should be able to see another aspect of al-Qaeda’s cunning plan that’s specifically designed to render Jenvey utterly friendless in the industry that sustains him.

Mr Jenvey works as both a spy and a journalist; this makes the charge that he would pose as one while acting as the other that much more believable.

(And note also the returning narrative of unused evidence – this time involving a mysterious go-between, ‘Mike’ – all of which appears designed to queer the deal with his intelligence contacts.)

Happily, we have to hand a trustworthy man who is familiar with both the spying and reporting aspects of Jenvey’s career, and he should be able to clear Jenvey’s name at a stroke:

To: Patrick Mercer, MP (Con.)
From: Tim Ireland
Subject: ‘Glen Jenvey’ audio

Dear Patrick,

I have been presented with audio that purports to be part of an interview with terror expert Glen Jenvey. The authenticity of this audio has yet to be fully established and I feel it only fair to warn you that some people – Jenvey included – suspect an extremist plot to discredit him:

You are known in media circles as a straight-talking man who is familiar with Jenvey’s intelligence-gathering capabilities and his work as a journalist. You are therefore in a good position to make a judgement about this audio file and its reliability/accuracy, and I’d be most grateful if you could answer the following questions:

– Have you in the past ever known Mr Glen Jenvey to not only work as a journalist and a spy, but also to pose as one while acting as the other?

– If so, would you regard the arrangements described in the first audio file to be a fair/reliable description of Mr Jenvey’s typical approach?

– Are there any reasons that you are personally aware of that might make evidence presented by Mr Jenvey somehow unsuitable for use inside of a courtroom?

– Just on the off-chance; are you aware of this ‘Mike’ person, and – if so – may we have his/her surname?

– What are your thoughts on the likelihood that this audio evidence has been fabricated (possibly by al-Qaeda operatives)?

I’m happy to publish any statement you may have, so please reply soonest.


Tim Ireland

So, pretty soon that should sort me for an answer to audio file #2.



I have no doubt that this audio evidence is the hollow mockery of an empty sham, and that Jenvey will be proved to be entirely innocent of any wrong-doing.

After all, we know al-Qaeda is capable of worse… and the alternative to the ‘set up’ scenario is such an unthinkable political nightmare for all concerned that one dare not spell it out.

No way in hell are we going to find out that elements of our security, diplomatic, parliamentary and media channels have all been under the influence of a dim-witted, ego-driven and woefully indiscreet wannabe doofus.

(knocks on wood)

Oh, and before I forget…



To: Jeremy Reynalds
From: Tim Ireland
Subject: ‘Glen Jenvey’ audio

Hi Jeremy.

I’ve recently come around to your way of thinking on this, and I was wondering if Glen wouldn’t mind making a brief statement about the likely authenticity of the following recordings:

I’m happy to publish any statement he may have, so please reply soonest.


Tim Ireland



To follow. Let’s roll.

UPDATE (3:30pm) – All public-facing phone (and fax) lines to the British Embassy in Kabul are “not accepting calls at present”. I am making every effort to reach Sir Sherard Cowper-Coles by other means.

UPDATE (3:45pm) – Valid email address for Sir Sherard found. Message sent. Problem solved.

UPDATE (03 Mar, midday) – Patrick Mercer’s office isn’t entirely sure if they wish to comment on evidence that hasn’t been fully authenticated. No word from Sir Sherard’s office yet. Meanwile, Glen Jenvey is taking a very long time to decide if this audio is authentic or not.

UPDATE (10pm) – I just finished a short exchange of emails with Mr Jenvey, and I have been promised further correspondence later tomorrow. Still no word on the audio’s authenticity.

Posted by Tim Ireland at February 26, 2009

Category: Consume!, It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!, The Political Weblog Movement, Updates

It’s been a year since I smoked my last cigarette. I know that I’m never going back.

1. Stay away from cigarettes, kids! Be cool like your Uncle Tim and stick to the candy fags.

2. If you’re addicted to nicotine and you live in the UK Try. The. NHS. Stop. Smoking. Service. It’s bloody brilliant.

3. Bite me, Philip Morris. And your little dog, too. That’s £1650 you’ll never see. Fear my hearty laughter. Mwahahaha. And so on.

4. ‘Zero’ is the most perfect of all numbers. There should be more of it.

OK, job done. Back to the grindstone.

PS – Yay, Tom: Government levels the playing field for Open Source … oh, and thanks again for the NHS, and for the smoke-free environments, just in case that didn’t come across. Now, can we maybe tidy up this torture nonsense? Please? I’d be able to enjoy all of these benefits a lot more if they didn’t come at the cost of some poor soul having their genitals mutilated. It’s putting me off my tea.

Posted by Tim Ireland at February 25, 2009

Category: It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!

Reuters – (Luke Baker) Exclusive: Lawyer says Guantanamo abuse worse since Obama: Abuse of prisoners at Guantanamo Bay has worsened sharply since President Barack Obama took office as prison guards “get their kicks in” before the camp is closed, according to a lawyer who represents detainees. Abuses began to pick up in December after Obama was elected, human rights lawyer Ahmed Ghappour told Reuters. He cited beatings, the dislocation of limbs, spraying of pepper spray into closed cells, applying pepper spray to toilet paper and over-forcefeeding detainees who are on hunger strike.

Posted by Tim Ireland at February 24, 2009

Category: It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!

A heads-up via Carl:

PA – Straw ‘will veto” Iraq minutes: The Government will exercise veto powers to block publication of key Cabinet minutes under freedom of information laws, it has been announced. Justice Secretary Jack Straw said he could not permit the release of records from 2003 discussions over the invasion of Iraq because it would cause too much “damage” to democracy…. For Tories, Dominic Grieve backed the decision to block publication but said it left an “overwhelming case” for a full review into the Iraq invasion.

With a safely narrow remit, I’ll wager.

Well, that’s it, then; the headline to this veto article may as well read; “Tory victory assured – ‘more of same’ to continue”


Meanwhile… (via)

(Jeebus… no wonder Labour wanted a lying cheat in charge of their rabid rebuttal unit. Draper will have to do some serious backflips to dodge any fair/open discussion of this on LabourList.)

UPDATE (25 Feb) – Via mark, two quotes from

“The flow of information between the government and people is fundamental to a vigorous and robust democracy. Information empowers people.”

Jack Straw, Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice – June 2008

“Freedom of Information can be inconvenient, at times frustrating and indeed embarrassing for governments. But Freedom of Information is the right course because government belongs to the people, not the politicians.”

Prime Minister Gordon Brown’s ‘Speech on Liberty’ – October 2007

But then, I’m sure there are equally-strenuous statements from each of these gentlemen assuring us that torture is wrong and that responsible democracies should do everything in their power to discourage it.

(Gosh, I hope members and supporters of the Labour party/government who are wondering why I’m outside the tent and pissing in are reading this post. It contains *clues*. Oh, and Derek Draper appears to be using the Iain Dale method of conversation censorship; if Draper and his team of tame writers avoid mentioning Lord Ashcroft Iraq or torture in their posts this week, any attempt to start a conversation about Iraq or torture on LabourList can safely be deleted/dismissed as ‘off topic’. Brilliant, eh?)

Posted by Tim Ireland at February 16, 2009

Category: It's War! It's Legal! It's Lovely!

Guardian – Miliband faces new ‘torture cover-up’ storm: David Miliband, the foreign secretary, was last night facing fresh pressure over torture allegations after it was revealed that his officials asked the US for help in suppressing crucial evidence. The Foreign Office solicited a letter from the US to back up its claim that if the evidence was disclosed, Washington could stop sharing intelligence with Britain. (via)

They went looking for an excuse to claim to be powerless.


Note also that they asked the previous U.S. administration for this and then tried to give the impression that it was the (unsolicited) position of the new administration.

See also:
Bloggerheads – Jack Straw, Tony Blair, and the ‘truth’ about torture
Bloggerheads – Jack Straw is a lying weasel (and other facts about torture)
Bloggerheads – More lies about torture

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