Eminem accordianised! A jolly good wheeze that reminds me of this little adventure.
Operation and the Temple of Doom. It’s pretty gruesome. Save it for after lunch.
Attack of the brain suckers from space! The instructions are furrin, but you’ll work it out.
Stunt-kiting! I suck at it.
Finally, here’s a merry little film strip that comes to us via Mary.
We’re all happy now, yes?
UPDATE – This little effort should keep you busy for a lonnnng time.
The Age – Blair unbeatable, says Tory campaign chief: The struggling Conservative opposition in Britain struck new difficulties yesterday when it was reported that even its new campaign director, Australian Liberal mastermind Lynton Crosby, believes Labour Prime Minister Tony Blair to be unbeatable.
Scotsman – ‘Tories can’t Win’ Claim Denied by Howard: Conservative leader Michael Howard today denied reports that his campaign director had told him he cannot win the general election. There was “not one iota of truth” in suggestions that Australian Lynton Crosby advised him to concentrate on a face-saving effort to increase the Conservatives’ strength in the House of Commons by 25 to 30 seats, said Mr Howard.
My, my… what a jolly day. Would anyone mind if I just posted a string of articles and then just held my heads in my hands and wept…?
ACLU – Newly Released Investigative Files Provide Further Evidence Soldiers Not Held Accountable for Abuse Investigative files released today by the American Civil Liberties Union suggest that the Army failed to aggressively investigate allegations of detainee abuse. Some of the investigations concern serious allegations of torture including electric shocks, forced sodomy and severe physical beatings. “Government investigations into allegations of torture and abuse have been woefully inadequate,” said ACLU Executive Director Anthony D. Romero. “Some of the investigations have basically whitewashed the torture and abuse. The documents that the ACLU has obtained tell a damning story of widespread torture reaching well beyond the walls of Abu Ghraib.”
Independent – US and UK ‘ignore torture by Iraqi police’: Iraqi security forces have been committing widespread torture and other human rights abuses while US and British authorities turn a blind eye, according to a report. The accusation that police and soldiers, trained by the occupying powers, are routinely mistreating detainees, including children, is made by the pressure group Human Rights Watch. In a report called The New Iraq – Torture and Ill-treatment of Detainees in Iraqi Custody, it has catalogued malpractice by security forces ranging from arbitrary arrest and severe beatings to extortion. It says the interim government of Iyad Allawi had flouted the principles for which the overthrow of Saddam Hussein was justified.
And here’s the report:
The New Iraq? Torture and ill-treatment of detainees in Iraqi custody
Meanwhile, in the land of liberty and freedom…
HRW – Human Rights Watch Opposes Gonzales Nomination: Human Rights Watch opposes the nomination of Alberto Gonzales to serve as Attorney General of the United States. Mr. Gonzales played a key role in providing legal justification for policies that led to torture and abuse of detainees in U.S. custody… Human Rights Watch has never before opposed the nomination of a cabinet official in the United States.
BBC – Guantanamo four flying back to UK: The last four British men held as terrorism suspects at Guantanamo Bay are expected back in the UK on Tuesday, after almost three years in US custody… Five other British detainees were freed from Guantanamo last year and were released without charge after questioning by police in the UK… Some later said they had been hooded, shackled to the floor in painful stress positions and witnessed beatings and other abuse during their time at Guantanamo.
BBC – Mass Guantanamo suicide protest: Twenty-three prisoners tried to hang or strangle themselves during a mass protest at Guantanamo Bay in 2003, the US military has revealed. A spokesman said the incidents were “gestures” aimed at getting attention, and only two of the prisoners were considered suicidal. Officials would not say why they had not previously reported the incident.
Like somebody needs to ask. The answer is security! And security requires secrecy…
Washington Post – Secret Unit Expands Rumsfeld’s Domain: The Pentagon, expanding into the CIA’s historic bailiwick, has created a new espionage arm and is reinterpreting U.S. law to give Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld broad authority over clandestine operations abroad…
BBC – Secret Pentagon spies confirmed: Senior officials in the US Defense Department have confirmed reports that the Pentagon ran a secret unit to help gather human intelligence.
Oh, and money. Security requires money. Lots and lots of money that’s being invested ever-so-wisely.
Boston.com – Bush wants $80 billion more for Iraq, Afghan wars as new deficit forecast is released: President Bush is getting ready to ask Congress for an additional $80 billion for conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, as budget analysts prepare new estimates of the federal deficits that would have loomed even without the wars. An $80 billion request would push the total provided to the Defense Department so far for those wars and for U.S. efforts against terrorism elsewhere in the world to more than $280 billion.
AP – Bush to Seek $80B for Iraq, Afghan Wars: Aides said about three-fourths of the $80 billion was expected to be for the Army, which is bearing the brunt of the fighting in Iraq. It also was expected to include money for building a U.S. embassy in Baghdad, which has been estimated to cost $1.5 billion.
But things are looking up. Freedom is on the march in Iraq…
BBC – Iraq election at-a-glance
Independent – Allawi fights to mobilise a terrified electorate
(At this point I feel I need to remind you that this is the same Allawi charged with torturing his own people and personally executing insurgents.)
And – just as they promised before bullshitting their way into Iraq – the US and the UK are promising to find a diplomatic situation for Iran…
Guardian – Straw emollient on Iran rift after US talks
Telegraph – Straw says no rift between US and UK on Iran
Politics.co.uk – Straw: US committed to diplomacy on Iran
*sigh*
The final word goes to Chicken Yoghurt.
A word to the wise: the Google Image Search database appears to have been updated. Finally.
(This only happens once every 12 months, which means that GIS is one of the crappiest aspects of Google’s service. But there’s new stuff there from today, so it’s worth having a poke around.)
UPDATE – Oh, and Google Video Search has launched just a few short weeks after Yahoo Video Search. The main difference between the two is that Google seems more aware than Yahoo of the possible unwanted strain on bandwidth this will lead to on some small sites; Yahoo appears to have begun with a general scoop and then allowed webmasters to add content if they wish, while Google has started only with content from US broadcasters and then allowed webmasters to add content if they wish.
Meet BikerFox. He’s a fashion trend-setter. (Link via The Ultimate Insult.)
Meet a chap from Long Beach, CA who will happily model for you.
Then spend time getting to know the 50 most loathsome people in America. (You’re at No. 3… sorry to spoil the surprise.)
Signs Of The Apocalypse – Bush: Today marked the beginning of the end, as George W. Bush took an oath to rape America for another 4 years.
(Latter link via BigDaddyMerk.)
Washington Post – Bush Speech Not a Sign of Policy Shift, Officials Say: White House officials said yesterday that President Bush’s soaring inaugural address, in which he declared the goal of ending tyranny around the world, represents no significant shift in U.S. foreign policy but instead was meant as a crystallization and clarification of policies he is pursuing in Iraq, Afghanistan, the Middle East and elsewhere.
Peggy Noonan – Way Too Much God: The inaugural address itself was startling. It left me with a bad feeling, and reluctant dislike. Rhetorically, it veered from high-class boilerplate to strong and simple sentences, but it was not pedestrian. George W. Bush’s second inaugural will no doubt prove historic because it carried a punch, asserting an agenda so sweeping that an observer quipped that by the end he would not have been surprised if the president had announced we were going to colonize Mars.
Independent – Gore Vidal: Iran next, then who?: George Bush’s apparent desire to create a state of perpetual war spells disaster.
The above article requires subscription, but it’s a cracker. I’ll try to find a free version of it today.
Also, take a peek at some images of inauguration protestors.
And a nice Quicktime movie: The Daily Show reacts to the inauguration speech. Liberty… freedom… liberty… freedom.. freedom.. liberty…
UPDATE – Our G-bomb should go off within the next two days. Hang in there. Or chip in, if you’re feeling impatient.
Today The Sun is fighting back against Misery Monday “to give you some FUN on the most depressing day of the year.”
To combat depression and/or prove this boffin wrong (no doubt he’s a killjoy leftie) they’ve “peppered the site/paper with happy stories” and provided readers with a long-overdue break from right-wing propaganda on Page 3.
Today, ‘cheery’ Neval (21, from London) helps put a smile on our faces by getting her boobs out and says: “How can it be ‘Misery Monday’, the most depressing day of the year? I’m here on Page 3 to brighten the day for Sun readers. I’ll know they’ll make the breast of it.”
That near-classic pun is the icing on the cake. It almost makes up for the ‘happy’ story about the Yorkshire Ripper on the front page.
Remember, folks…
Page 3 = Harmless Fun
… and anybody who says otherwise is trying to take away your will to live!
Stay happy.
From time to time a new blog comes up that deserves a general plug (as opposed to a link to a specific post). So today I’ve created a new category for pluggage of the like-minded. The term ‘reality-based community’ is explained in full here.
On with the pluggage…
Folks, I’d like you all to meet Mary, who comes to us via Chasing Daisy.
OK, that’s it. You can go about your business.
Them’s some mighty fine words, yessir…
I woke up with a G-bomb this morning, and was pleasantly surprised to find that the words I’d chosen were deemed suitable by more than one journalist…
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Your mission today is to create the following link and spread the word:
empty rhetoric
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Here’s a picture gallery and some light reading for when you’re done….
Glenn Kessler and Robin Wright – Bush’s Words On Liberty Don’t Mesh With Policies: President Bush’s soaring rhetoric yesterday that the United States will promote the growth of democratic movements and institutions worldwide is at odds with the administration’s increasingly close relations with repressive governments in every corner of the world.
Johann Hari – George Bush’s talk of spreading freedom and democracy is a sugar-coated lie: Nothing would make me happier than if the most powerful state in the world was committed to spreading democracy and toppling vicious governments. It is not; in many places, it is doing precisely the opposite. As George Bush begins his second term with another false cry, it is time to wake up.
Robin Cook – Fireworks in Washington, despair around the world: The president and his speechwriters have yet to confront the tension between their rhetoric about freedom, which is universally popular, and their practice of projecting US firepower, which is resented in equal measure. That explains why, on the very day when the president set forward his mission to bring liberty to the world, a poll revealed that a large majority of its inhabitants believe that he will actually make it more dangerous. The first indication of whether they are right to worry will be whether the Bush administration mediate their differences with Iran through the state department or through the US air force.
Also interesting:
No room for progressives on cable news inauguration coverage
There’s more on media failures here and an excellent example of a more subtle form of media control here.
UPDATE – Nice shot!
UPDATE – Bite me, Drudge.
This is a lovely round-up of events:
Slugger O’Toole – Northern Bank raid and political fallout, so far
Oh, and – if you’re interested – here’s the design of the new banknotes.
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